I’m Not A Saint Though?

Chapter 1

“This is driving me crazy, seriously.”

I flopped onto the bed and looked around the quarters where I was staying.

Luxurious furniture, soft bedding, rare fruits, and fragrant tea.  It was originally just a space on bare ground with a single cloth hung around it, but there wasn’t a single inconvenience to be found.

Then why did I look so glum?

It was because this was the last place I would stay in this world.

I was soon to be offered as a sacrifice to the Goddess.

In place of my half-sister, no less.

***

So, to explain from the beginning…

The Catalon Empire, where I was born and raised, was originally the most prosperous nation on the continent.

A country envied by all, possessing fertile farmland, abundant underground resources, beautiful tourist attractions, and a powerful army.

But now, it was simply a cursed nation.

Dried-up rivers, crops frozen to death, hail pouring down at any time.

Erupting dead volcanoes, and a terrifying epidemic sweeping the nation.

“A country once praised for being blessed by the Goddess… how did it become such a living hell?”

Most people guessed the reason was the Goddess’s wrath.

After the 28th Saintess died, the next Saintess, who should have naturally succeeded her, hadn’t appeared for 13 years.

The Imperial family, also subtly concerned about this speculation, tried every possible method.

They donated large sums of money to the temple, distributed clothes and food to the poor in the name of the Goddess, and even the Emperor himself led prayer services.

But despite this, the disasters didn’t stop…

“And so, the last resort they pulled out was this human sacrifice.”

To appease the Goddess’s wrath by offering virgins under the age of twenty as sacred offerings.

To avoid criticism as an inhumane nation offering living sacrifices, they disguised it as choosing the “Goddess’s Beloved.”

In reality, it was just being thrown as food for the “Goddess’s Representative,” the Lion, but quite a few people volunteered.

Because a considerable reward was given by the Imperial family to those who became the Goddess’s Beloved, the poor, struggling to make ends meet, offered their daughters.

But as years passed with no sign of the disasters ending, public sentiment grew increasingly grim.

“The country is in this state, but what are the Imperial family and the nobles doing?!”

“Look at the women chosen as the Beloved. They’re all commoners. There isn’t a single noble who offered their own daughter!”

“They enjoy so many privileges, but when the country is in crisis, they only force sacrifices on us commoners!”

The Empire hurriedly tried to control the situation.

They declared that each family must offer one daughter.

The nobles had no choice but to offer their daughters, but they employed a trick.

They offered their illegitimate daughters.

They couldn’t bear to let their precious legitimate daughters, who carried their noble blood, become lion food.

However, there are always exceptions.

There were cases where a legitimate daughter was offered as a sacrifice in place of a dearly loved illegitimate daughter, and that was me, Shaen Veloce.

“Oh, Your Grace is so cruel. To sacrifice the heir of the family to save a bastard child. There’s no such law in the world! Oh, our poor young miss…”

I swallowed a sigh as I watched my nanny, clutching my hand and crying her heart out.

“Yes.  I’m also flabbergasted.”

Born as the only daughter and sole heir of the Empire’s one and only Duke, I had walked the path of a successor since the age of five.

Even when my mother died in a carriage accident at age six, and even when my father brought his commoner mistress home right after the funeral.

Even when the bastard child born between that mistress and my father brazenly roamed the house, I didn’t care.

Why?

Because I was the legitimate child.

Because I was the one who would eventually inherit this Dukedom.

Such insignificant things could simply be chased away after I inherited the title.

“But what kind of damn fate is this? To be offered as a sacrifice in place of a bastard.”

I was so dumbfounded that I couldn’t even cry.

But I was already designated as a sacrifice.

There was nothing I could do now, even if I raged about how unfair it was.

Instead, I hugged my sobbing nanny and comforted her.

“Stop crying, Nanny. What can I do about my fate? It’s a truly shitty life, no matter how I think about it, but thanks to you, I was able to endure it. Thank you.”

Then I handed her a rather heavy box that I had prepared beforehand.

“I set this aside for you a few days ago while organizing my assets. You’ve worked so hard taking care of me all this time.”

“Oh, why are you giving me this? What good is this wealth when you’re dying?!”

Nanny roughly flung the box away and sobbed, holding me tight.

Seeing her, who was like a mother to me, break down made my eyes sting, despite having made peace with my fate.

It was at that very moment, as I was patting Nanny’s back with red, bloodshot eyes…

“Shaen.”

A familiar voice defiled my ears.

Sure enough, when I raised my head, a face I didn’t even want to look at came into view.

“…Father.”

What did he come all the way here to see?

To see what expression his daughter, whom he had driven to her death in place of his beloved bastard child, was making before she died?

Or to apologize now, pretending to be remorseful?

I sneered inwardly but naturally assumed it was the latter.

Even though he was a father who hadn’t given a shred of affection to his daughter born from a political marriage, he wasn’t trash enough to shift that responsibility onto his daughter.

Perhaps he was just an ordinary father, lacking only affection, like countless others in the world.

But the true nature of my father, which I learned just before my death, was truly astonishing.

“I checked a little while ago, and there’s nothing left of your assets. Did you perhaps dispose of it all?”

“…So?”

When I answered in a tone suggesting why he was asking such a random question, the Duke furrowed his brows.

“How could you dispose of it as you pleased? Even if it was your personal assets that you managed separately, its origin stems from the family!”

…What did I just hear?

Staring blankly at him as he flew into a rage, I soon asked in a bewildered tone, “So… the reason you came here is because of my assets? Because you’re upset that I disposed of them?”

It was even more absurd after saying it out loud.

‘What kind of person is this?’

His own daughter was on the verge of death, and the topic of their last conversation, which might be their very last, was just money.

I felt pathetic for having considered this trash my father all this time.

As I stared at him with contempt, perhaps realizing his blunder belatedly, the trash hurriedly waved his hands.

“No, that’s not it, what I mean is…!”

But before he could even offer an excuse, another voice cut in…

“Oh my, sister. What are you saying? Father naturally came to see you because he’s worried. He was just wondering if some unworthy person took advantage of the chaos and laid their hands on your assets. Isn’t that right, Father?”

A lovely beauty with fine pink hair and sky-blue eyes.

She, who looked at first glance like she had been raised with abundant parental love, was my half-sister.

“Melina, you came too.”

“How could I not come to see my sister off on her last journey?”

Melina, with her downcast eyes, answered and clasped my hand.

“The Goddess is too cruel.  Even if it’s for the Beloved, to take such a vibrant sister.  And the only heir of the Veloce Dukedom, no less…”

And then she shed tears like raindrops, her appearance so sorrowful that I almost fell for it.

“Why don’t you stop with the pretense, Melina. We won’t see each other again, so what reason is there to burn your acting soul to the end?”

“What are you talking about, sister? What pretense did I put on… I’m just so sad for you…”

“Melina. That dress you’re wearing, isn’t it mine?”

“Uh, sister! This, this is…”

Melina was startled by my pointed remark and tried to make excuses in a fluster.

She clearly wore it on purpose to get under my skin, so what was she pretending about?

“Even though you haven’t learned any manners, to touch someone else’s belongings without permission.  Just like your mother, who shamelessly occupied the Duchess’s room despite her status.”

Melina’s expression instantly hardened.

It was understandable, as I had reminded her of her lowly birth, a child who had lived her entire life with the inferiority complex of being half-noble.

Still, I felt no remorse.

Wasn’t she the bastard who, with nothing to her name, relied on her father’s affection and fearlessly tormented the heir of the Dukedom?

‘Considering what I’ve endured all this time, this is nothing.’

Seeing the corners of her usually arrogantly upturned lips tremble gave me a sense of relief.

But soon, an intruder appeared.

“Shaen, what kind of wicked behavior is this!  Your only sister came here, weeping sadly because she’s worried about you, and not only do you insult her by calling it pretense and acting, but you even insult her mother!”

The trash, enraged that his beloved daughter had been hurt, stepped in himself.

I burst out laughing.

“Worried, my foot.  Is appearing before me, the one pushed to death in her place, and spouting flowery words considered worry?”

“What?”

“If you’re so worried, tell her to step up and become the sacrifice herself. Ah, but you’d be the first to stop her, wouldn’t you? Because you couldn’t bear to see your beloved daughter torn to shreds by a lion. Right?”

“Shaen, you really…!”

His face turned the color of a rotten tomato, seemingly furious, but I didn’t care.

I casually leaned back on the sofa and asked, “But do you have time for this?”

“What?”

“It seems you’ve only investigated my personal assets, but that’s not all I disposed of.  I sold all the family’s assets and donated them.”

“Wha… What?!”

“Your brain is so slow, you didn’t anticipate that, did you? I knew it.”

I curved my eyes into a smile, watching the trash’s face become stained with shock.