ashes of the chosen

I wake up in a black void.

"Where... am I?" I ask.

Am I...

...dead?

I gasped at the thought.

Am I actually dead?

I can't see anything. I can't feel anything. Just the emptiness—cold and stretching forever.

"I'm dead," I muttered.

I was stabbed—near the heart. My body, already broken from fatigue, had no strength left to fight.

"I'm dead," I confirmed to myself.

And I thought about it. My life.

And all I could do was laugh.

Laugh at the miserable thing I called a life. At my miserable attempts to create something happy out of all that wreckage.

I laughed at how much I feared death. At how I kept running from it.

Only to find that death… wasn't scary at all.

I felt fooled. I felt betrayed.

Betrayed by death—this great, terrible force I'd always imagined. But in the end, it wasn't fire or darkness or even silence.

It was just…

Nothing.

And I had run all my life from nothing.

Realizing that, all I could do was laugh.

I could've been sad—but there was no one to hear me mourn. I could've been angry—but I had no way to take revenge on death. I could've felt betrayed—but there was no one left to blame. I could've celebrated myself—but there was no one to witness it.

So all I could do was laugh.

Because laughter doesn't need an audience.

You can laugh at yourself.

But soon, the laughter faded.

And the tears came.

Not because I feared death—no. That fear didn't exist anymore.

But because of what was left behind.

It's not death that truly hurts.

It's the regrets.

Things unfinished. Words unsaid. People I left behind.

I was sad because, for once, I had finally started to walk forward. For once, I was trying to become someone I could look up to. For once, I was trying to change.

And now, I had left that version of me behind. Left people behind—people who… maybe, just maybe, still believed in me.

I wanted to come back.

Because yes—I had lived like a coward.

But in the end, I faced it.

I faced death. I faced truth.

I wanted more.

I wanted to live—not out of fear, but out of choice.

Then… they came.

Hands.

Dozens of them. Hundreds. From every direction, hands reached for me—pulling, pressing, pushing, not in violence, but in desperation.

They entered me. Filled me.

With each hand, a new regret. A new story. A new longing.

These weren't my regrets.

They belonged to others.

To those who had no more time.

Those who had forgotten their names, but not their desire to live.

And as they filled me—completely, fully—I realized they weren't trying to take life from me.

They were giving theirs.

They wanted to live through me.

Because I still could.

Because I had one more chance.

And with that…

My eyes opened.

Rex was shaking me, his voice tight with urgency.

And Elissa—Elissa had tears in her eyes.

As I slowly opened my eyes, I saw the faint glimmer of Elissa and Rex in the dark—probably lit by the glow of Rex's blade.

Voices pierced my ears like needles, sharp and overwhelming. But as my hearing adjusted, I heard Elissa's soft sobs.

"I thought you were dead," she wept.

Rex leaned over, tension thick in his voice. "Are you alright?"

My voice cracked as I tried to speak. I could barely move. But somehow, I managed to bark out, "Yup."

I tried to stand, legs trembling beneath me.

I would've fallen—but Elissa caught me, steadying me just enough to stay upright.

Rex looked at me, concerned. "You're pretty worn out… Let's rest here for a while."

One strange thing kept nudging at the back of my mind. Why wasn't I hungry?

Especially me—after everything I'd just been through, after bleeding out and nearly dying…

"Food," I muttered, my voice still shaking.

"Food?" Rex looked at me, confused. "Now that you mention it… I do feel a little hungry. But yeah, it's weird—I didn't even notice it until now."

He turned to me. "Are you hungry?"

I shook my head—slowly, side to side.

He hesitated, then said, "I could try to find something around here. But if I leave and someone attacks…"

Before he could finish, I reached out and held his hand.

It was brittle. Dry. Almost… disgusting, honestly.

But I didn't let go.

Because he was someone I had saved.

And someone I wanted to save again, if needed.

Rex said, "So you want me to stay here?"

I nod.

As we sit in the hall looking at the dead slime turning to vapors, I realize that I might have completed my personal quest of "finding the executioner."

I wanted to check my watch but was too tired to do so. I wondered how much time it would take for me to heal.

Elissa, looking at the decaying body, says, "I think I was not meant to survive this long here. I was wondering how you two know me, or how I even ended up here… but I am thankful I met you two, and that you decided to take me with you even though I'm basically useless."

I thought: now that I can, I could probably give Elissa her memories back, and she probably will be able to become more vital.

But I thought—that wouldn't be too good.

I didn't know what happened to Elissa after her mother forced her to marry that landlord boy… but if that made a cheerful girl into a depressed woman, that would not be too pleasing.

But she is not good without the memory either. What if she becomes more fractured by the experiences in here?

That would be even worse, I remarked.

So should I give her memories back?

Should I let a beautiful flower wither in this storm—or make it ugly to let it survive?

But I decided to let the flower be beautiful—as it was the flower's essence to be beautiful.

Let the storm be violent—as its essence was to be disastrous.

But I will not let the flower wither.

Or let it be ugly.

I had no reason to keep Elissa's memory and keep her away from bloodshed.

It was in fact disadvantageous to do so.

But I still decided to keep her pure.

For reasons I kept to be decided by fate.

Because beauty needs no reason to be pleased with.

But then came a voice surging through everywhere.

It was Dr. Miyagi—from the vote.

He began:

"Uhh… so where should I begin?"

"Ahem… so the survivor count—out of 43 contestants, only 21 have completed their personal task. So the next phase of the challenge shall begin."

"If you're a bit confused about time… about a week has gone by after the selection. And here are the list of the 21 who have completed their personal task."

"As for the rest—they have 20 minutes to do it. Otherwise, they will be expelled from the first selection."

---

The list that appeared on the smartwatch was long, with new and old names on it:

1) Humans:

1.Kael

2.Rex

3.Noah

4.Selene

5.Lucian

6.liora

2) Keplers:

1.Kapler Z-1

3)The Masked One:

1.Seltana

2.Zoldias

3.Glacias

4.Blatini

5.Gelmany

6.Deltab

7.Robbins

Jelly Minds:

4) Candidate no jelly

1.Z-233

2.Z-237

3.Z-239

4.z-235

5)Mawlings:

1.Reroar

2.rorer

3.rer

---

As the list appears, I was not shocked that Elissa's mission must not have been completed. But I was worried.

How will she be able to do whatever mission she has?

As Rex hears this, he asks, "Elissa, what is your mission? Check the smartwatch on your hand."

Elissa checks her watch—but as she began to speak, I stop her by putting my hand on her mouth.

"Don't tell us. Do it—whatever it is—by yourself. Take help from Rex, but don't reveal your mission. It will cause you to die."

I'm not sure whether this applies to everyone, but it was stated in my watch that revealing the personal mission before completing it would result in immediate expulsion.

Which most probably meant death.

Rex said, "You're right. We can't reveal our mission till it's complete, right? Well, tell me what to do then, Elissa—without revealing your mission."

Elissa says, "But we need to find someone who hasn't completed their mission."

Rex thinks, then takes Elissa and runs out of the hall, leaving me behind.

As he runs, he says, "Just wait a minute, Kael. I will come back in a minute."

I understood where he went.

---

I stare at the long list again. Some names I know. Others blur past me like echoes of stories I'll never hear.

Elissa's mission still looms ahead. I don't know what it is. I don't want to know.

But whatever it is…

I hope it's something she can do—without losing the part of her I'm still trying to protect.

Rex's footsteps fade into the dark. The hall's silence closes back around me.

The countdown ticks louder.

Some have made it. But at what cost?

I close my eyes again.

Just for a moment.