[BL] Accidentally Becoming the Healer of the Deranged Archduke

The door smacked against the wall, making a loud thud. The impact nearly sent the hinges flying, but somehow the poor screws were still keeping it upright.

"Brother- You!"

The cub stood there, scandalized, clutching a pair of scissors like he'd just caught a thief red-handed, and this was his divine weapon to deal with him.

Startled by the sudden noise, Xion jerked subconsciously, and in the shuffle, his hand pressed directly against the very obvious bulge between Darius' legs.

The Archduke let out a strangled grunt that sounded exactly what it was. A sinful erotic moan.

"Are you a Beast?!" Noxian yelled in horror, face going crimson to the roots of his ears. "How can you—how can you be so—!"

He nearly choked on the word "lascivious," swallowing it back in shame at saying such a thing in front of his precious brother.

Darius, thoroughly unbothered, gave the younger knight a lazy glare.

The kind of look that promised something embarrassing than death, depending on how long Noxian planned to keep standing there with those ridiculous scissors.

Just like when he had defeated the young knight in the brawl with only three moves. The first two were only to taunt Noxian.

Pinning the young man under the pillar of shame, the Archduke buried his face back in Xion's neck.

"See?" he said, voice muffled enough that only Xion could hear. "Told you he's a brat."

He nipped at the delicate ear, earning a light swat that wasn't even a real protest.

Noxian stared at the tame beast, getting casually smacked on his head.

Meanwhile, his brother, still as soft-hearted as ever, rubbed on the spot with that indulgent smile on his pale face.

It has always belonged to me, the purple-haired cub thought in annoyance. Now I have to share it with this lunatic.

But honestly, it wasn't his fault that he couldn't stand the Archduke.

The way Darius was grabbing his brother by his waist, holding him so close, and that suspicious blush creeping up his dear brother's otherwise pale face...

All of it oddly reminded him of the times when he caught this deranged beast and his brother snuggling on the cold floor in that expensive herbal pavilion.

He clicked his tongue. After Bianca went to meet his brother there, even that pavilion had become out of reach.

The touch of possessiveness so blatantly obvious in the Archduke's actions had left him suffocating.

If someone tried to control his actions even to the smallest degree, he would have rebelled long ago.

Not to mention how everything had to go through His Grace's approval. From the medicine to the fabric used to wipe Xion's feet, nothing was spared.

But... was it the light streaming from the open window? Or was it the medicine taking effect?

He couldn't pinpoint it, but his brother looked somehow better. Glowing even, if that made sense in his fragile situation.

So, like a generous person he was, he decided to forgive this perverted devil. It wasn't hard to pretend to be a good brother-in-law.

Of course, that didn't mean he liked him.

But for his brother's sake, he could grit his teeth and fake not to dream of stabbing the Archduke's smug face with a dinner fork.

He took a deep breath, calming himself, only to hear the Archduke muttering something that nearly had him growl at him.

"Your dear brother came in here with scissors, like he is about to cut me."

While shamelessly complaining loud enough for fuming Noxian to hear, Darius placed another kiss on the slender neck. "Baby, don't just laugh. You have to scold him for me."

He sounded annoyingly smug.

From Noxian's angle, he couldn't see the Archduke's sneaky kisses. Only a glimpse of the face of the northern lord resting on his brother's neck.

"You ask me to be nice to him, and I have obeyed, haven't I? You have to take my side."

Noxian was exasperated by the overly dramatic sulking.

The vexation had his eyes go wide in disbelief.

"Brother, don't listen to him! Do you know he didn't even let me in the room when you were sleeping?" he huffed.

The angry knight even forgot the titles while walking straight to Xion. "I waited for hours with a hot towel and soup! But no, he didn't let me see you at all! You scold him for me!"

'Sleeping,' they all called it now. A quiet, mutual lie they agreed upon to soften the truth of Xion's fainting spells.

No one wanted to call it what it really was, a coma. It was a sign of his body slowly shutting down.

Though after the past week, the fainting had simmered down to only once or twice a day, and he could wake up in about half an hour at the latest, with the longest being four hours.

One could even call it a nap and be done with it.

It was better to be a corpse for two days directly, as it had been at the beginning. Everyone was glad, including Xion himself.

He patted Darius' head as a silent warning not to push things further in front of a youngster.

"Alright, enough," he said with a sigh. "Don't fight with a child."

"I am not!"

"He is not."

Two voices strangely agreed upon the same thing.

Then they both snorted at the same time, making Xion laugh aloud.

"Goodness, look at you acting like twins."

But indeed, with his broad frame towering over Xion, Noxian couldn't be called a child anymore.

That was the problem with every parental figure in this entire world. To them, their kids were always a little munchkin in constant need of protection.

Xion's protectiveness could even be called a bit fierce in that aspect.

"Why are you bickering in the first place? Don't you two know you're my favorite people in the world?"

That did the trick.

Noxian instantly beamed, cheeks pink with pride. While he was at it, he didn't forget to throw a smug look at the Archduke.

Darius merely snorted, though his arms didn't loosen around Xion.

"Alright, Your Grace," the smug brat said in a sickly sweet smile, "You have work to do, right? You can leave. Anyway, with me cutting brother's hair, he wouldn't have to play house with you."

"Cutting hair?"

Xion patted the silver hair as if consoling a big dog without even realising it. "Yeah, they are almost reaching my shoulder now."

"Can you not cut them?" Darius pleaded, gently tucking a few naughty strands behind Xion's ear. "They look good."

"Oh, do I, now?" Xion was almost amused. How could long hair look good on him?

His fingers, though, curled slightly into his own lap. "You always say that, no matter how bad I look."

"You, of all people, can't look bad, darling. Even fairies would be jealous of your beauty."

"Yes, brother. Don't listen to him, you look good with short hair too."

With his weakened state, Xion was half convinced that he must look like a corpse. Pale and scrawny. The reduced flesh on his stomach, the jutted bones from his joints had told him the reality he couldn't see.

With dark hair falling over his eyes, would he look like a ghost about to crawl out of the screen?

"Don't lie, you two."

"I'm not, brother." Noxian plopped on the floor, eyeing his tools, which were swiped to the corner.

"I'm really not lying, sweetheart," Darius was quick to retort as well. "They look good, and we can even match."

Match what?

Looking at the confusion evident in his furrowed brows, Darius leaned in and sneakily whispered for only the two of them.

"Black and silver hair will perfectly match our bodies, baby—every time I slide into you, we tangle up the same way. Can't tell where I end and you begin. No?"

Heat flushed over Xion's ears and down to the nape of his neck, exactly where Darius' hot breath was lingering.

"Idiot," he directly smacked the snuggling head, only to hear the carefree laughter of the Archduke.

"Go, do your work," he said with a defeated sigh.

Anyway, it was impossible for him to win against his lover when it came to being shameless.

"You're chasing me out?" Darius pouted like a toddler. "Huh, baby is being bad."

Noxian coughed exaggeratedly. "Did you guys forget I am also here? Stop flirting, will you?"

Xion, of course, didn't forget. He was just too comfortable while leaning his entire weight on Darius.

"Can't you remain silent for a second?"

"I refuse."

Before the two brats could start bickering again, Xion spoke.

"Go early and come back early, my dear. Oh, and can you ask the kitchen if they can make something sweet for dinner?"

After days of swallowing bitter and bland potions, his tongue was starving to have something delicious.

Just 'my dear' had Darius beaming from ear to ear. "Sure, I will inform them. Anything else you craving?"

"No, that's it for now."