Crazy Britain:They’re All Raising Me

Though Ritsuka Fujimaru had gone out of her way to play matchmaker, Will had only reluctantly agreed to team up with Artoria. But soon enough, another issue reared its head.

"So... about the person you're trying to find—do you even know where they are?"

As Artoria asked the question, Ritsuka noticed Will's steps falter for just a second.

"Ah..." She slapped her forehead. "So, you really don't have a clue where to go next, do you?"

"I'm still... searching for clues," Will replied while glancing around cautiously.

"Right. But weren't you the one who just blasted this entire area to smithereens with your Noble Phantasm? What clues do you expect to be left?" Ritsuka said, exasperated.

"...True," Will muttered as he retrieved the research notes from his system storage and began flipping through them, his expression darkening. "So... if Frankenstein isn't at Viktor's mansion, then where could she be?"

"She?" Artoria picked up on the key word immediately, blinking in curiosity. "Right, I forgot to ask—who exactly is Frankenstein? And why are you looking for her?"

Will hesitated. It wasn't like he could just brush her off the way he often did with Ritsuka.

So after two seconds of silence, realizing he couldn't weasel out of this one, he sighed and answered flatly:

"Well, not to scare you or anything, but... I'm already dead."

"Dead?" Ritsuka's expression changed. She rushed to Will's side, peering closely at him. "You don't look dead—oh, wait!"

She suddenly smacked her own forehead. "Right! You're a Servant now, so technically saying you're dead kinda makes sense... but aren't you still possessing Hyde's body? Doesn't that mean you're technically still alive?"

"No. It's got nothing to do with that."

Without emotion, Will reached behind his back and drew his sword halfway from its sheath. Then he held his hand against the blade and dragged it across.

The gash on his hand opened cleanly—but no blood came out.

"My body has no blood in it anymore," he said. "So in a way, I'm a living corpse... or a zombie."

"Wh-what the—!?" Ritsuka's eyes went wide. "Since when?! Wait, don't tell me... was it that time, right after we got back and met you again—?"

"Yes." Will nodded. "I don't know what that idiot Jekyll did... but when I woke up, this was the state I was in. Now I have to find a way to restore myself—otherwise, I might never wake up in the real world again."

"Ohhh!" Mash perked up. "So that's why you were looking for Viktor Frankenstein—since he created life from assembled corpses, right?"

"Exactly." Will nodded. "Though I arrived too late... But I found in his notes that his creation, Frankenstein, might also be able to help."

"Hold on—if your blood was drained and you're basically undead now, then that means... was it Bavanzi?" Artoria's expression sharpened in an instant.

She remembered from her simulation with Oberon that anyone who got their blood sucked by Bavanzi could turn into one of the living dead.

"That's... not really important," Will replied, pausing for a moment before brushing past the question. "Let's focus on what matters—"

But someone wasn't letting him off that easy.

"Not important? You almost died! If this weren't the dream world, you wouldn't have come back! With all due respect—don't you think you're coddling Bavanzi a little too much?"

"Eh?" Ritsuka blinked. "Wait—Artoria, you know Bavanzi? Oh! That means you're both from the Fairy Kingdom, aren't you?"

"Yes. And this so-called 'Bloodlord' here had an exceptionally good relationship with Bavanzi." Artoria frowned. "So you can imagine how confused I am to see her of all people doing this to him."

Though her voice stayed mostly calm, her narrowed eyes and furrowed brows made her feelings plain.

"Still," she continued coldly, "even if you want to protect her, there has to be a line. The part of you that's from the Bloodlord should not interfere so much with Hyde's choices."

"Okay, hang on—" Will raised a hand. "You don't seem to understand how possession-based Servants work. It's not like I've got two separate personalities in one body. Well, okay, Jekyll and Hyde count, sure—but with the Bloodlord, it's not like that. We're merged. There's only one consciousness now. That's how a proper possession Servant works."

"I know that," Artoria replied. "But since you're not purely the Bloodlord anymore, shouldn't you focus more on yourself? On your own happiness instead of always prioritizing someone else's? It's because you're like this that I can't keep silent anymore."

Her tone tightened with growing frustration.

"You spent your entire life protecting Bavanzi. And we all know how that turned out. And yet here you are—even as a Servant—still doing it."

"Wait, what are you talking about?" Will cut in, annoyed. "I don't even know the full story yet. For all I know, Bavanzi wasn't even trying to hurt me! Maybe something else happened—maybe it was Jekyll's fault—"

"Oh, come on! Even in your so-called evil persona, you're this lenient? I can't even imagine how soft your good side must be! What could you possibly have done wrong?"

Artoria's anger was barely held back. Though she'd matured in this dream version of herself, Will knew that if it were the real her, she'd probably be shouting by now.

Still, even now, some of her words were starting to get under his skin.

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?" he snapped. "Are you saying I look like a softie? Don't push me—I will turn on you."

"Don't ask me. Ask Miss Fujimaru." Artoria turned to Ritsuka, who was visibly overwhelmed as the argument reached its peak. "You tell me—doesn't this 'evil' persona of his seem completely harmless?"

"Uhhhhhh..." Ritsuka winced. This was the last kind of question she wanted: the kind where no answer was safe.

She was suddenly thrust into the same kind of moral no-man's-land she always imagined only cheating boyfriends had to face.

After several seconds of careful thought, she answered:

"I wouldn't say harmless, exactly. But he's definitely not a bad guy either. Sure, some of his requests were a bit... questionable, but whenever I did what he asked, he always kept his word. So... if we're judging him based on that, I think he's decent."

Just as expected, Artoria zeroed in on the word requests.

"Oh? He made requests of you? What kind?" She glanced down at Ritsuka's maid outfit, her eyes widening. "Wait—don't tell me that was his idea?!"

"Well..." Ritsuka dragged the word out while glancing at Will.

Sure enough, his face twitched, and he quickly averted his gaze.

Yup, Ritsuka thought smugly. Definitely guilty. He totally didn't want Artoria to find out about the whole "maid costume and call me master" thing.

So she plastered on a bright smile and said:

"No no no, this has nothing to do with him! I've just always thought maid outfits were cute, and I figured, hey, we're in London—might as well try the authentic thing! As for his conditions? Oh, he just wanted us to act like his little helpers. Totally reasonable. I really do think he's a good person."

"Hahhh..."

Will exhaled, visibly relieved. But still avoiding her eyes, he muttered:

"Fine... Good person or whatever. Not like that's an insult. But as for Bavanzi, we'll revisit that topic later. Artoria, just let me handle it, okay?"

"..."

Artoria stared at the two of them, clearly seeing through every unspoken word.

Her face darkened.

"Heh."

The scoff was icy cold.

"You know what? Coming here to help you was a mistake. That's on me. I was being stupid. So I'll just go. You and Bavanzi can do whatever the hell you want—it's not my business anymore."

"Huh?"

Ritsuka froze.

What the heck just happened?! Weren't they just starting to get along? How did it all fall apart again?! She'd tried so hard to patch things up...

Are all people from the Fairy Kingdom this hard to deal with?

"Wait—" she began, but Artoria cut her off, voice steely:

"No need to say anything. It's not your fault—I know you were trying your best to mediate. I just realized I can't work with this guy. At least not the Bloodlord part of him."

She stepped forward, light gathering around her, preparing to vanish the same way she had arrived.

"But if we don't help Hyde," Ritsuka called out, "and he doesn't find Frankenstein, he could actually die, right?"

Artoria froze mid-step.

"...Fine. Hyde and the Bloodlord are both equally insufferable. But Jekyll is innocent. I'll help for his sake."

She turned back to Will, expression calm again.

"Just give me Frankenstein's description. I'll use my high-speed movement to scour London and find her."

"...Okay."

Will sighed. He wanted to say more, but held back. Best not to provoke her again.

"According to Viktor's notes," he began, "she should be a young woman with rather messy pink hair, heterochromatic eyes, a golden metal horn on her forehead, and two heavy gold cylinders on either side of her head... What's wrong?"

He noticed Artoria had suddenly gone stiff.

"Wait..."

She took a deep breath to compose herself, blinked slowly, then said:

"That girl... I think I know her. In fact—I was just with her a moment ago."