Chapter 51: Reason for Harry's Behaviour
"What is it?" Dumbledore asked with a concerned face.
"Headmaster," said Harry; hesitation, anxiety and uncertainty still marred his face.
"You see the scar has intensified… it is more prominent and more clearly visible."
"The scar… it has been believing strangely from the past few days," he added in a stammering voice.
"Believing strangely, you say?" Dumbledore asked as he leaned forwards.
Harry nodded while Dumbledore added, "Explain in detail, Harry."
"The scar has been hurting for the past few days," Harry began his explanation.
"It would feel like if something is stinging… something sharp and pointed at the scar. Then the pain would travel to entirety of my head and my entire head would hurt… hurt so much."
"As the pain spreads, I feel it not only physically," Harry continued. "I would feel it mentally too."
"I would feel suffocated… oppressed… as if I had been lost in a very dark and gloomy place. during such times, I can do nothing more clutching my head."
"The pain makes me unable to do anything," Harry finished.
Dumbledore had his eyes narrowed as he listened to Harry's description. He could make a guess what was happening to Harry.
"Not only this," Harry continued. "When I sleep… in my dream, I seen flashes… snippets of some images."
"It is like I am viewing the world from the head of some another person," Harry concluded.
Dumbledore's eyes further narrowed at this. And a genuine frown appeared on his face.
"I understand all this Harry," Dumbledore said in a comforting tone after few moments of silence. "And I promise I will find the reason and a solution for it."
"But I do not understand, how is this related to your action," Dumbledore continued. "Your unexpected aggressive… not only aggressive but a violent behaviour."
"Headmaster," Harry said with a deep sigh as if trying to suppress his anxiety. "The hurt and the pain is not the only thing about the scar."
"Sometimes… I feel that something else takes more control over my emotion," Harry continued; appearing lost for correct words to explain his situation.
"It is not like as if I have lost control… it is just that I am not entirely in control," Harry added. "My emotions, they are overwhelmed and then I perform actions which I would not have done normally."
"Like in the compartment when that man called, Hermione a mud blood, something snapped inside him," Harry explained. "This was not the first time someone had done such thing and I had always felt a lot of anger but I had never done anything."
"But this time, anger overwhelmed me and I do not know, how and why, I suddenly became so aggressive that I broke his skull."
"I was in the control the whole time but at the same time I felt as if my emotions… my feelings are not in my control," Harry added.
Dumbledore's gaze was contemplative as he listened to the explanation.
"Do you understand me, headmaster?" Harry asked in a slow voice.
"Yes, Harry," Dumbledore smiled. "Although, you have not articulated it correctly, I have been able to get a gist of it."
"Then do you have any solution for it, headmaster?" Harry asked with a hopeful expression. "My scar, could its problem be solved?"
"Ah! Harry," Dumbledore smiled his usual grandfatherly smile. "I believe this is not a big problem to get worried over. It is just that you are growing and your emotions have become unstable. Try to control your emotions."
"Even so, I will try to find a solution to it… something that would ease your problems," he added.
Harry nodded though his hopeful face had now turned downcast.
"I will be punished?" Harry asked; his voice low.
"Harry," Dumbledore placated. "Even though, I understand your problem, you cannot be completely absolved of your actions. It will set a wrong precedent."
"What will be my punishment?" Harry asked with hesitation.
Harry knew that old coot would not let this matter go easily. Harry's 'unnatural' behaviour had a serious risk of throwing many of Dumbledore's plan out of the loop and hence the old man would definitely try to tighten the leash around his neck. And Harry was genuinely curious what will Dumbledore come up with? Something, that could still maintain him in Harry's good books but sufficient enough to keep the leash tight.
"Well, Harry," said Dumbledore; his smile has dimmed a little. "Since, Mr. Walse is a student of Slytherin house, Severus has requested me that he gets to decide the punishment."
Harry's eyes widened in 'horror' while an expression of 'fear' appeared on his face.
"But you are the headmaster," Harry blurted out in shock. "You can surely deny his request."
Seeing this a smile appeared on Dumbledore's face. The trust Harry had for him, the security he felt with him was what he needed to maintain.
"Yes, Harry," said Dumbledore. "I am the headmaster but I am not a tyrant."
"Your actions have blown out significantly and even if I am a headmaster, I have to agree to reasonable requests."
Harry's face fell as Dumbledore added, "But I believe that you should not worry too much… Severus will also be reasonable in his punishment."
Harry gave a saddened nod as he got up to leave the office but Dumbledore interrupted him.
"Wait Harry," he said. "I have one more issue, I need to discuss with you."
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