Re:Zero kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu web novel

　The battle was more brutal than imaginable.

　The two men faced each other and exchanged fists head-on.

　Flesh hits hard bone, muscles burst and blood drips. Shouts rise, breathing bubbles mix with the unpleasant sounds, and the gore of the muddy fight is burned into the eyes and ears of those who see it.

"...Subaru."

　Standing in front of the tomb's entrance and watching the battle, Emilia places her hand on her chest and calls the man's name.

　Confused eyes, trembling fingertips as if searching for something to cling to. The warmth of a trustworthy presence that was always close to her heart continues to bind her, even though she knows it is gone.

　Inside the tomb, Subaru said something.

　Subaru asserted that he loved her, that she was important to him, and that's why he believed that.

　His words were certainly a relief to me, but they also made me feel more anxious.

　Even now, with each passing moment, my genuine memories are being revived.

　Emilia has come this far believing that her false memories were her beginning. When that beginning, that trigger, is altered, how will she change?

　Even now, after they had spoken their true feelings to each other, Emilia's anxiety was still deeply rooted.

　Subaru shouted that even if Emilia had changed, his feelings for her would not change.

　A boy who was willing to fight for her, even if it meant getting hurt and suffering -- she had no intention of doubting his feelings. That was all he had continued to prove.

　--The one person I can't believe is myself.

　I started walking in the wrong direction, and stopped dead in my tracks, even though I was looking ahead to the end. Now, even though I'm looking ahead to the end, I hesitate, wondering if I started out in the wrong direction.

　My feet suddenly stopped.

　Will he be allowed to walk again?

　At that time, will I be walking a new path, or the same path as I am now?

"――――"

　I continue to wander through a labyrinth of questions with no answers and no way out.

　Even now, unable to speak up, and knowing she had no right to stop it, Emilia continued to watch the men fighting before her.

"--!"

　A scream of agony rang out, particularly high-pitched, and blood spurted out.

※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※

　The fist cuts through the air and is swung.

　The fist was coming towards my face - but it was pitifully slow.

"Tch!"

　No drastic evasion is necessary.

　With a minimal tilt of his head, he dodged the punch without even a scratch. With his opponent thrown off balance by the swing, he thrust his knee sharply into his exposed torso, ripping open his innards.

　He felt the thin muscles and ribs on his knees, and the impact reached his organs deep inside. The mouth that had already spat out its contents countless times was now spurting out a new stream of blood and vomit from the merciless force.

"Ah."

　He was clutching his stomach and staggering about in an unsightly manner. His arms were knocked down as he swung them over his rounded back, and after striking him from the front, his insides were shaken wildly from behind.

　The knee kick had prevented him from falling, but he couldn't withstand the blow from behind and he rolled over. He kicked the fallen body onto its back and followed up with a toe slam into the left side of his abdomen.

　Intermittent screams.

　A cacophony of heavy breathing mixed with bloody phlegm and vomit.

　Fists, knees, toes. With each strike, the sensation of skin, flesh, and bone being scraped back reverberates.

　What would normally be an uplifting feeling now just feels particularly unpleasant.

　An act repeated over and over again - what meaning does this have?

「Just give up already, you know!」

　He yells insults at his pathetic opponent, who is coughing and spitting out bloody phlegm.

　He still hadn't lost consciousness. No matter how hard I hit him in the head or kicked him in the stomach, he still refused to give in.

　Even though I make my body understand that there is such a big difference in strength, it still happens.

"You ignorant bastard, hey! There's no chance of winning! You're timid! You're swinging around pointlessly! Your body's axis is shaking, it's no use!"

"...Well, that's bad."

"Oh, damn it! Do you know how I feel, having to go along with your meaningless stubbornness and play? No way, no way."

　He spat, taunting Subaru as he tried to sit up, gasping for breath.

　Subaru, in front of Garfiel, who was now raising his voice, somehow managed to stand up, with both arms on the ground. His face was swollen from the constant punches, and blood from his nose stained the lower half of his face. He must have had a few broken or chipped teeth. It wouldn't be surprising if some of his internal organs and ribs were damaged.

　Even though excruciating pain was raging through my body and it was difficult to even stay conscious.

"What's the point in that?! I challenged you because I thought I had a chance of winning! All you've done is left a disgraceful, tattered mess that's unbearable to look at... I told you to just go to sleep!"

"--Argh!"

　Stubborn, obstinate - a tenacity that cannot be fully expressed with words like that - Garfiel continues to relentlessly torture Subaru's body.

　He shook off the arm that was on the ground and dug his toes into the side of the fallen body. He kicked the rolling body, spitting out blood, from below, and then pushed the floating body down with his elbow from above.

　Subaru bounced off the ground, his whole body slamming into the hard earth, causing him to sprawl out.

　His eyes rolled up, he let out a faint sigh, and this time his body finally stopped moving―― As he finally lost consciousness, Garfiel let out a long sigh,

"What, you've got a done-with look on your face..."

「――――!!」

　Garfiel, his shoulders heaving with heavy breathing, opens his eyes wide in shock at the voice from below.

　In front of the stiffened Garfiel, the man who should have been certain he had completely lost consciousness stood up, his upper body shaking.

"Right, that's not it..."

"Yeah... I'm not joking. Getting hit like that... that's not a laughing matter, I can't feel happy..."

"That's what I mean..."

"--Rua!"

　Displaying the tenacity of a scene from a nightmare, Subaru took a sharp breath and swung his fist.

　Of course, even with all his might, to Garfiel it was no more than a child's punch. He lightly put his hand on the fist to deflect it, and in return delivered a palm strike straight through his stomach.

　A blow that pierced the gaps in his internal organs, transmitting an impact to the water within his body—it tightened his empty stomach, which no longer had anything left to vomit, causing yellowish gastric juices and blood to flow back up.

"Ah, ahh..."

"No matter how many times I try, it's the same, how many times do I have to tell you that..."

　As Subaru collapsed on the spot, clutching his stomach, he again urged him to surrender.

　Unable to bear seeing such an embarrassing sight, Garfiel averts his gaze and even clicks his tongue.

"--!"

　Subaru's right fist, having not collapsed, roared as it passed right in front of his nose.

"Huh!?"

"You bastard, Garfiel. Who gave you permission to do this?!"

　Left arm forward, right arm back.

　Subaru, still showing signs of not losing his fighting spirit, fills Garfiel with fear.

　I don't think of them as a threat at all.

　It was clear to everyone that he was just putting up a false front, and the vast power gap between Garfiel and Subaru could not be bridged no matter how hard he tried.

　Even if he continued to recklessly attack like this, there was a solid difference in strength between them, enough that she would continue to dodge his attacks no matter how many times she tried.

　And so, all of Subaru's struggles, everything, were useless.

　No matter how much pain and suffering he endures after being punched, kicked, or thrown by Garfiel, his body, depleted of all its reserves, will never be able to reach Garfiel's.

「You, don't mess with me…!」

"Ahh...?"

　Even against opponents he cannot beat, he still stands up, armed only with his determination.

　Only the mind will not break, only the will will not be defeated. Perhaps this mentality is what people sometimes call strength, a strength that does not come from the body.

　Some people may be moved by the sight of him getting back up no matter how many times he falls.

　However, if he puts on a show like that, hoping that I'll change my mind, it would be the greatest insult.

　Only our hearts remain unbroken and unbending. What is the point in that?

Subaru: "Even if you can't win like that, do you think that if you just keep on being stubborn, eventually I'll pull back my fist? I'll get tired of punching and kicking, and I'll acknowledge your spirit and back off… Do you think I'll be swayed by emotion and say I lost…!"

"――――"

"I'm not joking. This confrontation between you and me isn't just a game! I'll knock you down, and you'll knock me down. There's no other way to settle this!"

　Stomp on the ground.

　The power of the ``Divine Protection of the Earth Spirit'' overflows, and vitality fills my body via the earth.

　His body was in better shape than when he'd pushed through his exhausted body and come here after finishing his battle with Ram and the others in the forest. Far from increasing his fatigue, a fight that was less than a fistfight with Subaru was no different from sitting in the shade of a tree and taking a rest.

　Could such a tiny influence have even swayed Garfiel's heart?

「You said it didn't you!? You said I'd show you that you're weak, didn't you!? What do you mean!? What do you mean weak!? What do you mean I'll show you! The one who's being pushed down because he doesn't have enough strength, the one who's a big fool who doesn't think things through, are you!」

　I remember every word of the threat Subaru gave before the battle.

　It's all so stupid. It's all a lie. Everything about this man is a mass of fraud.

"Both of those two who challenged me, Big Bro and Ram, were determined to beat me! That's why I gave it my all against those two. I racked my brains to come up with a plan, and when I needed more power I mustered all my intelligence... they certainly had the spirit to be recognized by me. How about you!"

　Though the details are unknown, Otto used the power of his divine protection to turn the forest into his ally, cornering Garfiel. His determination to fight, which drained all of his will and intelligence, and the way he pushed Garfiel into his final great magic, were enough to make Garfiel want to praise him highly, saying that it was the best thing a weakling could do.

　Ram's subsequent surprise attack left Garfiel feeling betrayed and heartbroken, but the battle itself was typical of Ram.

　It was a merciless, no-holds-barred battle with a truly strong opponent.

　Both of them tried their best to fight Garfiel and snatch victory.

　That way of life is admirable. So much so that Garfiel is forced to admit it, even though he is his enemy.

"Compared to that... you're just the most pathetic. No matter how many times you get beaten down, you keep getting back up... so what? No matter how many times you get hit, your spirit never gives in... that's what's great. Even if it's a fight you can't win, you never run away... what's so great about that!"

"――――"

Subaru: "You think I'll be moved? Covered in blood, with shaky legs, and eyes barely able to open properly, you still stand up, you think I'll be overwhelmed by emotion? I'll turn you to pieces… just how much you've made a fool of me and those who stood up for you."

　Now, Garfiel is born, and his heart burns with the greatest rage.

　The battle had been tarnished. He had been insulted. Not only that, but the nobility and purity of purpose of those he had recognized in the battle, this man's way of being tried to stain them with filth and humiliation.

「Go to sleep. Get out of here. You pathetic, disgraceful, shitty shitty bastard. The best thing to do is just admit defeat and go to sleep, you idiot!」

"..."

　Subaru continued to take the brunt of Garfiel's constant barrage of abuse without relaxing his stance.

　Shaking his head unsteadily, his half-closed eyes somehow managed to focus on Garfiel. His fighting spirit was still there, but that very filthy appearance was an eyesore.

　If his heart remains unbending after being hit so hard with words and fists, then what can be done to break it?

　If the pain isn't enough, there is only one answer.

"Why don't you say something yourself, huh!?"

　Turning around, Garfiel calls out to Emilia, who is looking his way from the entrance to the tomb.

　Suddenly, as the topic of conversation turned to Emilia, her thin shoulders trembled, and Garfiel clicked his tongue in annoyance at the weakness he saw there.

Subaru: "You should be the one to tell him that you don't need to look! No matter how much I say it, he's not gonna listen. Tell him kindly and with the mouth of the woman he loves that it's embarrassing and uncool, that no matter how hard he tries, it's meaningless, that it's shitty!"

"...I, I am."

"What!? You can't say it? In your eyes, does this guy still look like he has a chance of winning? And you just look at it like that? Watching a man who's in love with you become a complete mess because of you, and you're immersed in the illusion that he loves you, what's up, hey!?"

"--!"

　Emilia's eyes widen as she freezes in place at the malicious words being showered upon her.

　Garfiel's words, unbearable to hear, pierce Emilia, who has been watching the battle from the sidelines.

　If Garfiel's fist won't stop it, Emilia's words will be the only way to stop it.

　If Garfiel broke his body and Emilia broke his heart, then surely this time Subaru would finally bow to his knees.

　Emilia, who was watching the battle, repeatedly twisted her face in pain as she watched Subaru being hit.

　Unlike Subaru, who was preparing himself for some incomprehensible decision, Emilia's heart hadn't yet solidified at all. She was still the same girl who'd been crying and whining after losing the Trial at the Tomb.

　Garfiel had no intention of specifically criticizing him for that.

　It was only natural that he would be defeated by the Trials in the past. How could anyone deny the memory of their greatest regret?

　It's a foolish idea that we can overcome regrets in the past.

　A madman who confuses ideals that can be realized with dreams that can never be reached.

　The boy standing before him was a true madman, obsessively pursuing his own fantasies and forcing them on others as well.

　He's the same kind of fool as Roswaal, a one-dimensional fool who can only see one thing.

"Just stop her and everything will be over! You and I! We're all in that damn witch's hands. That's all there is to it."

"I--"

　At Garfiel's words, Emilia straightened up as if struck by lightning, and opened her eyes wide.

　Her eyes, slightly moist with tears and a mysterious color, looked at Subaru, who stood there in agony. Her trembling lips, urged by Garfiel, called out to stop Subaru's stubbornness.

　And that's it.

　However――

"Emilia."

"――――"

　Before Emilia could speak, Subaru called her name.

　Closing her mouth, the tip of her red tongue peeking out, Emilia listened to Subaru's husky voice, trying her best not to miss any words he might say.

　Subaru had just one thing to say to her.

"...Look at me."

　A short word.

　A hushed voice, as if muttered only inside the mouth.

　However, upon hearing this, Emilia looked up in surprise, and after a few seconds of hesitation,

"--Yeah"

　Yes, I nodded, placing my hand on my chest.

"...Huh!?"

　Watching the exchange between the two, Garfiel, unable to understand, raises a question.

　However, as Garfiel's eyes widened in rage, Subaru took a deep breath and pointed his finger at him.

"...You've been babbling nonsense for a while now, but you're wrong, Garfiel."

"What?"

"You might think I'm a fool for trying so hard even though I have no chance of winning... but I'm not joking. Getting into a fight knowing from the start that I can't win is something I've learned my lesson from a terrible experience I had before. I'll never do it again."

　Subaru's face was swollen and crumpled, but he still grimaced in disgust.

　Garfiel had no way of knowing that he had spoken of it before, but it must have brought back some very bitter memories for Subaru.

　However, right now, there is something I cannot miss more than these feelings.

"There's no point in talking to me. Far from ideals or dreams, I can't even see what's right in front of me. If you've stopped challenging opponents you can't beat... then this situation, hey. What is this situation?!"

"That's obvious, you idiot. I haven't given up the fight even once."

　Subaru, whose voice had begun to regain strength as he spoke, declared to the howling Garfiel.

　The inexplicable strength contained within it made me so angry that my throat instinctively closed up.

"As long as I'm not able to stand up, I won't give up the fight. ... The time when I can't stand up won't come until I'm killed."

"..."

"And yet, you back down at this crucial moment, so you won't be able to kill me... In other words, you can't stop me. Even if it's just a little at a time, I'm getting closer to my victory. My victory is unshakable."

「That's ridiculous…! The issue isn't whether I can kill you or not. It's how you're going to do it! How you're going to struggle! How are you going to destroy me, huh!?」

　It's like a battered and tattered rag, and no matter how many words you string together, it's nothing more than empty armchair theory.

　Subaru's argument is merely an extreme one. Saying he won't stop unless he's killed is simply a statement of intent. Even if that premise were to be accepted, would Subaru continue to move unless he was killed, and would eventually be able to inflict a fatal wound on Garfiel?

　Such a thing cannot happen, and it would take a great deal of time and miracles for it to happen.

"If I crush your limbs and render you powerless, that'll be the end of it! Whether you're conscious or not, whether you have the will to win or not! None of that matters!"

　Garfiel roared, furious.

　The vitality of the earth was drawn up from the soles of his feet, restoring his exhausted body to about half of its usual strength. It was enough power to tear Natsuki Subaru apart.

　He stamped his feet on the ground and approached Subaru, who was standing there motionless.

　Seeing Garfiel approaching, Subaru took advantage of the situation and thrust out his fist. So stupid. So slow. Not enough in any way. He dodged it with ease and hit him with one blow to the torso. He drove his knee into Garfiel's lowering jaw, grabbed his body as it lurched backwards and threw it to the ground with all his might. He stomped his heel down on the collapsed, face-up body, and did this twice, three times in a row, eliciting a cry of agony.

　A series of relentless blows. This is it.

"...Is it over?"

"--!! What the hell are you doing!!"

　Subaru, whose body should have sustained even more serious damage, stood up.

　With this in front of him, an unidentifiable feeling finally begins to take over Garfiel's heart.

　I was worried that I might not be able to beat him. I might not be able to win. But that wasn't the kind of worry I had.

　Really, as this man says, there is a doubt that accumulating physical damage alone will not be enough to stop him.

"What's the point of risking your life for something like this?! If you throw yourself at it desperately and somehow manage to defeat me, then that half-demon will be able to win the Trial?! Do you really think that's possible, huh?!"

"..."

"Such miracles can only happen one after the other! There's no way something so convenient could happen! Even if, by some billion chance, you were to defeat me, it wouldn't change anything about that woman! It's the same for everyone! Those who made mistakes, who were burdened with a hopeless past... who have only been gazing at stewing regrets, can't do anything about it, either forward or backward! Why don't you understand!"

"You're the one, why don't you understand――!"

「――――!?」

　It was too weak to be called a yelling tirade, and too emotional to be called a plea.

　Taking the opportunity when Garfiel lost his sense of coherence, Natsuki Subaru's shout cut in.

"Don't you dare decide everything on your own, Garfiel...!"

"What are you talking about..."

Subaru: "Don't you dare decide Emilia's limits. She's not that weak."

　Far away, at the entrance to the tomb, Emilia gasps.

Subaru: "Don't you dare decide my limits and give up on me on your own. I won't give up on you until I give up, even if it means breaking my knees or throwing everything away and crouching.

　Subaru spat out blood and the glint in his eyes grew stronger.

　and,

"You, why have you given up on yourself so arbitrarily? You can't do it yet. You can do more than that… How long are you going to cling to that stubborn conclusion you came to when you were a kid, your arms and legs hadn't even fully grown out. Your pubic hair hadn't even grown in yet…!"

　Subaru had declared to Garfiel's face that the beliefs that he had stubbornly held onto and that had kept his heart bound to the Sanctuary were pointless.

"――――"

　Garfiel opened his mouth immediately to say something back.

　However, as if something had stabbed him in the chest, no sound came from Garfiel's throat.

　I can't say anything. Nothing comes to mind.

　My mind was blank. I didn't think that this guy was right. There was no way I could be wrong. I started doing this after I knew I was wrong, so there was no way I could be wrong.

　You must not be wrong.

　So this man who claims Garfiel is wrong must not be allowed to stay.

"Haa... haa... I get it..."

"..."

"I have to stop you. I don't understand anything you're saying. And yet it just makes me feel sick. So, I'm going to stop you."

　It has to be stopped.

　And the only way to stop it is probably to do exactly what this man said.

　--This man won't stop until we stop him.

"Then... I'll kill you..."

"Can you do that?"

"Don't be ridiculous. --There's a way to do it from the beginning."

　If I have to kill him to stop it, then I'll kill him this time to stop it.

　Choose the means to achieve this now.

　—I choose to surrender myself to the hateful, repulsive blood of the beast that lies dormant inside my body.

"--Oooooh."

　Holding his own body, Garfiel was burned by the heat that made his blood boil.

　The fever was so high that it seemed as if the breath he exhaled was mixed with a red color. Every cell in his body was wriggling, his muscles were swelling, and his body volume was exploding.

　His limbs became as thick as logs, his torso expanded to the point that it burst his loincloth. Golden hair grew all over his body, and his sharp canines grew long and blade-like in an instant.

　The nose juts out, the pupils narrow, and the color of the world changes.

　His thoughts became incandescent, and the spirit that was present here as Garfiel Tinsel was wiped away.

　The exhilaration of transforming into a beast and the feeling of reason being overwhelmed by the beast's instincts.

　When it was all over and he returned, Garfiel would find pieces of meat scattered all over the place. That would be the final image of Natsuki Subaru.

　We had to go to such lengths to stop it.

　I have no intention of regretting or repenting for that.

　It's the fault of the person who lacks strength.

　The weak can't give anything. That's all.

　Loss of consciousness.

　The animal's instincts cheered, and it opened its jaws to bite its poor prey to death――

　--The beast, having lost all sense of reason, had its vision completely obscured by the black smoke that erupted.