The Silence Of Lost Feelings

The day of graduation dawned bright and clear, the kind of day that seemed to promise new beginnings. Lumen stood in front of his mirror, adjusting the collar of his shirt, his fingers trembling ever so slightly. He had been waiting for this day for months, rehearsing in his mind the words he would say, the way he would finally confess his feelings to Lina.

He had his portfolio under his arm, a collection of sketches that held not just his artistic growth, but his deepest emotions, his regrets, and his hopes for the future. Everything he had done—everything he had worked toward—was for this moment. He had convinced himself that if he could just show her, if he could just put everything on the table, she would understand. She would see him not as the boy who had hesitated and lied, but as someone who had grown, who had finally figured out what mattered.

Lumen's heart was pounding in his chest as he made his way to the ceremony. He tried to calm himself, telling himself that it was just one more step, that this was the final hurdle before everything fell into place. But with each step he took, a weight seemed to settle deeper in his gut. He wasn't sure if it was the anticipation or the realization that he had no idea how Lina would react, but the nerves were unbearable.

When he arrived at the venue, the familiar faces of classmates surrounded him, laughing and celebrating, but everything felt distant. He scanned the crowd for her—his eyes seeking her out without thinking. He knew where she would be, standing among her friends, laughing and joking like she always had. But what he didn't expect was the sight that hit him like a punch to the gut.

Lina was standing beside Jun.

They were holding hands, and as Lumen watched from a distance, he saw the way they smiled at each other. It was the kind of smile that spoke of deep affection, of a connection that had been built over time. Jun's arm was draped casually around her shoulders, and Lina's laughter—genuine and bright—rang out in the air.

Lumen's breath caught in his throat, the reality of the moment crashing over him. He had always known that Lina might move on, that there was a chance that someone else could take the place he had hoped to fill. But seeing it with his own eyes, seeing her so happy with someone else, was a bitter pill to swallow.

The sight made everything feel like it had happened so quickly, so quietly. One day, they had shared moments of laughter and possibility, and the next, she was no longer a part of his world the way she had been. Lumen stood frozen for a moment, his heart sinking as he realized that he had missed his chance. He had waited too long. The words that had once seemed so crucial now felt irrelevant, insignificant in the face of her happiness with someone else.

His mind flashed back to the plan he had carefully crafted—the portfolio, the confession, the hope that somehow, his achievements would be enough to show Lina that he was serious about her. But now, standing there, watching her with Jun, he understood how foolish that had been. The portfolio wasn't going to change anything. The sketches—his attempt to show her how much he cared—now seemed like a weak, desperate attempt to recapture something that was long gone.

Lumen could feel the weight of regret pressing down on him. The truth he had avoided for so long was clear now: he had waited too long. He had convinced himself that time would work in his favor, that his efforts would eventually speak louder than his silence. But it wasn't about time. It was about courage. And he had lacked it when it mattered most.

"So that's how it is." He muttered as he forced his composure.

He walked away, the portfolio feeling heavier than ever, its contents now meaningless in the face of this new reality. As he made his way through the crowd, his footsteps felt slow, each one dragging him farther from the moment he had imagined for so long. He had dreamed of confessing his feelings to Lina, of showing her how much he had changed, of finally having the chance to make things right. But now, all he had was the knowledge that it was too late.

Lumen found a quiet corner, the noise of the ceremony fading into the background as he tried to process the overwhelming rush of emotions. He felt numb, a mix of sadness and self-loathing washing over him. This was the price of hesitation, of letting fear dictate his choices. He had lost her. And there was no going back.

As the ceremony continued, Lumen stayed to the side, watching from afar as Lina and Jun celebrated, surrounded by friends. He felt a pang in his chest, a mixture of longing and acceptance. He had failed to act when it mattered. But in the end, he had only himself to blame.

Lumen closed his eyes for a moment, allowing the quiet of the moment to settle over him. He could still remember the warmth of her smile, the way she had once believed in him even when he didn't believe in himself. But that was in the past. Lina had moved on, and as painful as it was, Lumen knew he had to do the same.

The sound of laughter and conversation continued to drift over him, and Lumen, for the first time in a long time, felt the weight of his own solitude. The journey he had hoped to take with Lina had ended before it even truly began.

He looked at the portfolio one last time, its contents now a silent reminder of everything he had lost. He didn't need to show her the sketches anymore. The truth was clear: he had let the most important moment slip through his fingers.

It was too late.