The Sun Prince - Re:Zero OC

"So… I will send the order to have the new works commissioned. We'll ask for the fountain's centrepiece to be a wolf… is there anything else of note?" Crusch asked, looking down at the parchment.

A wolf… I remember Priscilla mentioning that being her favourite animal.

A white wolf, specifically.

Perhaps I should try to get a present for her… either being a stuffed animal, or maybe even an actual wolf, considering her taste.

"Umm… the mines are asking for more personnel, as well as an expansion of their available territory…" Ferris added, hesitantly raising his hand.

Right… that.

"The demand for metals have increased, so I expected this… tell them to create an application form, and we'll incentivize some new immigrants to join their operations with subsidized pay… and there are a few hills to the south that might contain iron, at least from the surveyor's opinion, so relay that to their operations," I said, sending a nod to Ferris who marked it down in his notebook.

"Understood… is there anything else?" Ferris said, looking around, flinching slightly as his gaze landed on Priscilla.

Pris still wasn't very happy with Ferris, but at the very least, she was able to tolerate him now, and allowed him to join the critical camp meetings like this one.

Small steps…

"If that is all, then let us conclude this meeting. It has gone on for long enough to bring me to the edge of boredom," Priscilla said, standing up. "Selian. I will be having a bath, so be prepared to fix my hair once I am finished."

"Of course, my lady," I said, giving her a smile before turning to the other two. "And thank you both for the efficient meeting. It was quite difficult to do it with only the two of us, so your help is greatly appreciated for the incoming development."

Honestly… between meeting those involved, overseeing planning, surveying the needs for growth… it would be hell on earth for me.

"It is my pleasure," Crusch said with a calm smile as Priscilla headed out the door.

"And same for me! But, I do have to go check on my cute little apprentices, so I'll see you all later!" Ferris said, standing up. "Oh! And Selian, I'm probably going to get called to the capital again, since a lot of nobles have their yearly check-ups coming up soon. I'm guessing that's fine?"

"Yeah, just make sure you clear everything up with the hospital before you leave," I said, nodding to him.

"Got it!" he replied before making his way out the door.

Well… at least he seemed happier now.

I guess Ferris had finally found a place here, at least in his mind.

"Selian… Priscilla-sama mentioned you doing her hair… is that common?" Crusch asked, having watched Ferris leave with a bittersweet smile.

"Hm? Well, yeah, I usually do it every morning, although she is able to do it herself," I replied.

"I see…" she said, looking down at the table. "Would you say that you are good at it?"

"I would like to think so, yes," I replied. "At first, I only knew what I did from helping Felt, but at this point, I have quite a bit of practice from doing Priscilla's."

I mean, even if I said I did Felt's hair, that was at most a simple braid as she had always kept it short.

"Is that so? Well, in that case… do you think you could… help me with mine?" she then asked.

…What?

"I… suppose I can, but… why?" I asked, raising my eyebrow in question.

"Well… I have recently been wanting to try a different style than the straight hair I have at present. Ferris used to do it at his own insistence, but with the effect of Gluttony… well, I doubt that will happen anymore," she said, revealing a sad smile. "And due to relying on him in the past, I unfortunately lack the skills to do it myself… so, please."

I mean… she could always ask a maid to help, but if she was asking me this in confidence…

"Hmm… alright. Do you have any tools in your room?" I asked.

"Of course. Please follow me," she said, standing up as she began heading for the door, her face looking down the entire time.

Well… I guess I should follow her.

Closing the door to the meeting room behind me, I followed Crusch to her room, which wasn't too far away, before hesitantly entering inside.

There wasn't anything… too private in here, right?

She had invited me, after all.

"I-Is there fine?" Crusch said, gesturing to her bed.

"That should be fine… do you have a hairband, or something similar?" I asked.

"Yes, on the bedside," she said as she took a seat.

Looking over at the table, fit with a lamp, a small book, and an empty glass, I quickly spotted the hair tie that she had mentioned.

"Alright, then give me one moment," I said, grabbing the offered ribbon before I took a seat beside her. "Please turn around… and what style would you prefer?"

"Uh… a braid, please," she said, turning away.

A braid… well, I wasn't an expert in these things, but I don't think that Priscilla's style would fit her.

Crusch looked quite good with a ponytail, so maybe a simple braid going down the middle?

Yeah, that sounded good.

Hesitantly taking her hair into my hand, I then began my work, creating the strands to start weaving them together as a slightly awkward silence settled between us.

"So… how do you feel about it? About being here, I mean… as a knight of Priscilla and helping in managing the territory," I said, deciding to start a conversation. "And lean your head forward, please."

"Ah, of course. And, well… it's very different from before," she said, tilting her head down as per my request. "I do love seeing the growth around here as time passes… when I was a Duchess, while I could call myself competent, it was mainly about maintaining the status quo of our territory's success."

"I see… and I'm guessing this is quite different," I said, beginning to cross the gathered strands over each other.

"Yes… absolutely," she said. "But… it is very fulfilling, to see families come together like this… and the progressive plans that you have proposed are quite amazing. Many I could see leading this nation to a golden age of prosperity if they were implemented to a wider range of the land."

"Ha. Well… we need to gain the throne first for that to happen," I said. 

"But with the results of you and Priscilla-sama's exploits, it is starting to feel like a forgone conclusion," she replied.

"I suppose… but do not forget that you are now a part of this as well," I said.

"Ah… right. I guess… I am," she said.

Another silence descended upon us, but this time being one that was more comforting than awkward, as I finished braiding her hair.

"So… how does it look?" I asked after I finished, watching as she turned to look into the mirror in the corner of the room. "I do have to say, while the straight hair looks nice, this style definitely suits you well."

As I stood up, I watched as her eyes widened as she took the braid into her hand, tilting her head to get a better angle as a subtle blush formed on her cheeks.

She must have really liked it, huh?

"Y-Yes… I suppose it does… thank you," she said, turning to look at me.

"No problem," I replied.

As her eyes met mine, I watched as she began to open her mouth, as if looking to say something.

"Selian… do you…"

"Selian! I am finished, so I require your assistance!" Priscilla's voice rang from the hallway.

I guess she was done her bath.

"Crusch? Were you about to say something?" I asked, getting ready to attend to my lady.

"Ah! N-No… I just wanted to thank you once more," she said, bowing her head.

"It really is of no concern… but I should go to her before she gets mad," I said, heading for the doorway.

"Yes… you should," she said, her smile growing… strained.

Weird.

But unfortunately, I had a bigger thing to deal with.

Such as how exactly Priscilla was going to ask me to style hers today… and also controlling myself with the scent of her freshly bathed body.

— Crusch Karsten —

Watching as Selian took his leave, I looked back into the mirror at the sound of the door closing behind him, running my hand along the new braid that he had so thoughtfully prepared for me.

Honestly… he was quite skilled, just as he had said, but that was expected considering how Priscilla always looked amazing.

And with how gentle his touch was…

A faint smile tugged at the corners of my lips as I turned toward the window, looking beyond the glass, where the town beyond glowed beneath the darkness of the night.

With the little over two months I had spent next to Priscilla and Selian, I couldn't help but think back to a friend that both Ferris and I missed dearly.

The Fourth Prince of Lugunica, Fourier Lugunica… who was also Selian's brother.

More specifically, I had been thinking about my feelings concerning him… the feelings of admiration, and more than that… the guilt.

Ever since the day of his confession and his consequent death, I had promised myself to look inward, focusing on my feelings a little more in order to find an answer as to how his words affected me.

However, before I could, I was revealed to be a candidate for the royal selection, so I shifted my focus onto the goal of taking back our nation's independence, and severing the contract with the dragon that had only watched as Fourier, someone it was obligated to protect, died.

But now that I was no longer in the selection, and instead served as another candidate's knight… I had found the time to focus on those feelings.

No, rather… I was forced to focus on them, considering the circumstances.

But eventually… especially with that earlier scene… I was able to find the answer.

I loved Fourier… but only as a friend, just like how I love Ferris.

And perhaps, in a different world, I could find myself loving him romantically, especially if I hadn't been as dense to his feelings as I was before.

But now, romantically… and sexually… I knew that I was only attracted to one man.

A certain former prince of the nation, and someone that had given me comfort in the most terrifying moment of my life.

It was quite ironic, considering that my brain rejected the two who were so devoted to me, yet my heart ached for someone who was devoted to someone else already.

But I had discovered that feelings were simply like that… they didn't always follow logic or reason.

"Haa…"

Releasing a sigh, I glanced over to ensure the door was closed before standing up and opening my wardrobe, taking out a dress that I had decided to purchase on a whim for… formal occasions.

Taking another look at it, I briefly pressed it against myself as I looked in the mirror.

Hmm… Fourier did say that he loved seeing me in dresses… did the same go for all men?

I had always thought that I was too masculine to make a man's heart skip a beat, especially after Ferris had promised to take on the burden of my femininity so I could take over my father's position without worry, but now… now I wanted to change.

And Selian had said that my hair was nice, so perhaps… perhaps it was possible.

Would he enjoy seeing me in this dress? Would it excite him?

Those thoughts flashed in my mind, but unfortunately, considering how he had dressed Priscilla until I joined their cause, and with how beautiful she was, it was doubtful.

I already knew I wasn't fit for the traditional sense of beauty, but still… I wanted to try.

And so, I quickly changed into the dress, ensuring my hair was kept in its braid while I did so.

But still… simply changing for the sake of it seemed redundant.

It was a warm night tonight, one perfect for a drink, so perhaps I should enjoy it.

Taking a bottle of my favourite liquor from the bottom drawer, as well as a glass on my desk, I then walked out of my room, heading towards the centre balcony where I could enjoy a nice night, and hopefully, take my mind off of things.

But as if fate had intervened… the very thing I wanted to take my mind off of had gotten there first.

"Hm? Ah, Crusch… it's rare to see you out here," Selian said, turning back to his notebook as he leaned against the railing. "Coming to enjoy the night?"

"Yes, but… I could say the same to you," I said, closing the glass door behind me as I began walking over. "So… what exactly are you doing?"

"Ah, this?" he said, raising his notebook as he looked back up at the sky. "Well… just mapping the stars. It's something I did in my childhood, but on a night like this… well, it just felt right to give it another look, you could say."

"I see…" I said as I went to take a seat on the nearby chair.

The night was extraordinarily clear, with the whole sky dotted with the light of stars, so I could see what he meant by that.

But mapping the stars… that was quite the interesting hobby, although it seems that he was done with actually doing any work, and was simply stargazing as of right now.

So… he wouldn't mind this, right?

"Selian… would you like to join me for a drink?" I asked, setting my glass and bottle down on the table. "I would do it often on nights like these, although Ferris would usually be the one accompanying me… so, would you mind?"

This feeling of nervousness… it was as strong as the sensation I felt before the fight against the White Whale… no, in some ways, it was even worse.

"Uh… no, it would be my pleasure," he said, walking over to me as he slowly sat down in the seat to me left. "But… isn't there only one glass?"

…Oh.

He… was right.

…But did that really matter?

"M-My apologies… but… I am fine with sharing… if you are okay with it," I said, opening the bottle as I poured it into the glass, my eyes focused on not wandering to my left.

If my eyes did wander… I had a feeling that the nervousness that I was keeping deep down would explode.

"Well… I guess that's fine," he said.

Why was I so flustered about a simple thing?

And why, under the effects of this state, did I not want to get another glass instead?

No… I knew why.

Closing my eyes and pursing my lips, I then took a small sip of the liquor, feeling the familiar burning sensation run down my throat as I savoured the taste.

If only that burning could rid me of these… impure thoughts.

"This bottle… this is from the Karsten territory, isn't it?" he asked, looking at the label.

"A-Ahem! It's technically an import from Gusteko, but yes, my family has distributed this across the nation for a while," I replied, placing the glass back down. "It's… a familiar taste of home, you could say."

Nostalgic… that was indeed the right word.

Nostalgic towards the time when my parents knew of me as more than a royal candidate's knight… and instead as their precious daughter.

But I had long since accepted my situation, so I would not wallow in despair.

Instead… there was a future I could look towards.

"I see…" he said, taking the glass as he took a very hesitant sip, his eyes widening a moment later. "T-That's quite strong… so I think I'll pass for the moment."

Ah, right… he was quite the lightweight in terms of alcohol.

I could already see his cheeks flushing as he put down the glass… the glass where his lips had touched, right where mine had but a few moments earlier…

No, stop this.

This was simply a tender moment to be shared between friends.

"That aside… it's rare to see you dressed up like this," Selian said, his eyes darting over to me.

Ah… I felt a bit embarrassed now, being under his gaze.

Was this really the right decision? 

To dress up like I was to attend a party for no reason?

You were much too hasty, Crusch Karsten!

"Still… it looks nice on you," he then said, causing my hand that was raising the glass to my lips once again to stop.

…Oh, my.

That… felt quite pleasant.

Words that I had heard before, but such a compliment coming from him, in a time like this, with what I was wearing… well, I really had to fight the giddy smile that was fighting to form on my face so that I didn't embarrass myself.

"T-Thank you," I said, quickly taking another sip, this one a bit larger than the last. "It's… I simply wanted to try something different."

He simply nodded in understanding before his head turned back to the sky, his red eyes sparkling under the moonlight.

That star-struck gaze… I wanted it to be directed at me, but even I knew there was no chance of such a thing.

Because no matter how much he complimented me, and how often he stood at my side… there was someone else he was devoted to.

Remembering his love for Priscilla, I couldn't help but frown.

"That aside… I'm surprised you aren't with Priscilla-sama at the moment," I said, looking forward. "You two are practically joined at the hip, after all."

"Well… she wanted to get her sizes taken for a new dress, so I couldn't quite join in," he said, scratching his cheek. "I… can't quite deal with that just yet, so another maid took my place… although, Priscilla did have quite the laugh at my expense."

He couldn't deal with that? Why?

"…Really? Didn't you see her naked all the time before I began helping her change?" I asked.

Not to mention how their current relationship had progressed…

"Well, that was just her underwear, and I tried not to look," he said, shaking his head before he narrowed his eyes at me. "And what's with this line of questioning? Are you teasing me?"

I felt the frown on my face slowly release as I began giggling lightly at his annoyance, waving my hand in dismissal.

"I apologize, but… perhaps I am," I said, raising the glass to my mouth. "But still… I am a little curious about your relationship. I had thought that the two of you would have crossed such a line by now… even though I do not have any personal experience to compare it to."

Selian leaned back into his chair as a small smile formed on his face.

"If we were in a regular situation, then perhaps we would have advanced much further… but, for better or worse, we're not," he said, shaking his head. "I love her. Stronger than anything but what I feel towards Felt, I love her… and I know she loves me too."

I ignored the pang of hurt in my chest as I nodded at him to continue.

"But we cannot advance our relationship hastily. A mistake like a pregnancy during this critical time would be extremely detrimental to her cause, and then there is the slight issue of her also being my master…" he said with a sigh. "But in essence, you could say that there is no rush. So advancing our relationship… well, you could say that we are taking it slow."

'Taking it slow'… from what I had seen the two doing when they thought I wasn't looking… their lips locked in what seemed to be a fierce battle for minutes on end… it was hard to call such a thing 'slow' for a relationship.

But I guess his reasoning was a good one… even if hearing such a thing made me feel slightly upset.

Yes… it made me feel upset… because these feeling were something that I needed to accept.

Glancing over to his face, I felt my frown deepen even more.

Yes… I had decided.

I like him… romantically, I like him.

He was the one who made me feel like a normal woman despite my stature, he was the one that made me believe in my femininity, and then gave me a place to call home when I was at my lowest when he didn't even remember me, unlike Subaru.

And then, even more than that, he showed me that Lugunica could become independent, and could grow to new heights under the leadership of himself and Priscilla.

But this love… anyone in my position would know that it was doomed to fail, and I wasn't under any delusion either.

Still, even if it had no hope of coming to fruition with Priscilla as my rival… I would still cherish this feeling of love.

And so, shaking my head to get rid of these feelings, I released my frown as we continued our conversation into the night, only stopping once a maid eventually came to tell us that Priscilla had finished being measured and was now preparing for bed, initiating Selian to return to her side.

A doomed love… well, even if it was so, I could at least cherish a friendship.

And these festering feelings… well, that was simply another challenge that I would need to overcome.