Troublemaker’s Guide to Immortality

"Alright, that's the deal. Once you reach Foundation Establishment, you can spend more time together. For now, it's giving you this tuft of fur as a keepsake," Yun Jin explained.

The little Radiant Beast carefully tucked away the fur, its eyes sparkling with joy.

Yun Jin couldn't resist adding, "But honestly, there are plenty of male beasts out there. No need to obsess over this one. When I spoke to that Thunderflash Beast, I noticed several females eyeing it. I suspect it might be… a player."*

"Awoo awoo awoo awoo awoo!" (Impossible! Even if it had other partners before, once it's with me, it won't pay attention to them anymore!)

Yun Jin facepalmed internally.

Fine.

Love-struck brains clearly know no species boundaries.

If nothing unexpected happens, she'll likely be a regular at the Spirit Beast Pavilion from now on. As for this Radiant Beast, she'd just keep an eye on it for a while.

After all, spirit beasts at the Qi Refining stage had the intelligence of about a seven- or eight-year-old child. They're still the little flowers of the nation, worthy of a bit of extra care.

Yun Jin let out a quiet sigh.

Being a beast tamer felt a little like being a kindergarten teacher...

A group of kids chattering nonstop, and you had to carefully protect their fragile little hearts, offering guidance at just the right moments to prevent emotional breakdowns.

Hard. Way too hard.

"Elder Ling," she called, "mission accomplished."

Ling Fei shot her a resentful look. "What exactly did you discuss?"

Yun Jin grinned. "That's a secret."

A child's secret still deserved to be kept.

Ling Fei was so frustrated he almost blew his mustache off, but he held it in.

"Come on, next group," Ling Fei said with a sigh.

There weren't many spirit beasts left that needed tending. With Yun Jin and a few other disciples helping, they quickly finished the work.

Once all the beasts were resting comfortably, Ling Fei raised a brow and said, "I promised earlier that you could choose a spirit beast to form a contract with. You're now at Foundation Establishment, so you can choose from beasts at the Qi Refining or Foundation Establishment level. Any higher and you won't be able to contract them yet. You've toured the area with me, so, tell me, is there one that caught your eye? If not, I can take you to the Foundation Establishment zone."

As soon as he finished speaking—

All the Qi Refining beasts perked up their ears.

Ling Fei might still be unsure...

But they were certain.

This human could understand them!

Not to mention, she was good-looking and spoke gently.

They all yearned for the outside world, but were also scared of ending up like the Iron-Eater Beast with a bad master.

But if it was this girl... maybe it wouldn't be so bad?

The spirit beasts immediately started chattering away.

"Pick me! I can grow huge! Super impressive!"

"Pick me, pick me! My farts can knock out a crowd!"

"Bah, useless skills. I can breathe fire—top-tier combat power!"

Ling Fei couldn't understand what they were saying, but seeing them argue with red faces—if beasts could blush—left him dumbfounded.

Previously, when disciples came to pick a spirit beast, each one was cautious to the extreme. Without enduring trials and tests, no beast was willing to form a contract so easily.

But now, with Yun Jin, it was like they'd thrown all their standards out the window. No tests, no hoops to jump through. Just fighting over who gets to be picked.

If the earlier disciples saw this, they might cough up three liters of blood on the spot.

As the beasts argued loudly, the Iron-Eater Beast silently turned to face the wall.

Shameful!

These companions were utterly embarrassing!

Had they learned nothing from its example? Humans—none of them could be trusted!

This woman was no better!

Even if she formed a contract now, once she found out you weren't strong enough, she'd abandon you in a heartbeat.

The Iron-Eater Beast had seen through this fake world. It would never leave the Spirit Beast Pavilion again!

Ling Fei was startled by the scene. He gave a bitter laugh and said, "I was going to say, even though I agreed to let you choose one, the spirit beast also has to accept you and put you through its trials. But now... I guess there's no need to say that. Just pick one. They all seem eager."

His tone was tinged with sourness, like a father marrying off his daughter, only for her to leave without even looking back.

Yun Jin chuckled. "Thank you all for your enthusiasm. But I can only form one contract for now, and in my heart, I already know which beast I want."

All the spirit beasts looked even more hopeful.

The Iron-Eater Beast snorted.

Look at these pathetic creatures!

It, the Iron-Eater Beast, was different.

Even if this human begged on her knees, it wouldn't agree!

As always—

Beasts do not serve!

"I want to contract with the Iron-Eater Beast," Yun Jin said, her voice clear and steady.

Iron-Eater Beast: "...Huh???"

It thought it must have heard wrong. Its fur quivered all over.

"I think the Iron-Eater Beast is really cute," Yun Jin said with a warm smile. "I'd like to invite it to be my partner. I don't know if it would be willing."

The Iron-Eater Beast went rigid.

It hadn't misheard.

She had really chosen it.

How to describe this...

There was a tiny bit of... smug satisfaction?

This woman had pretty good taste.

But the Iron-Eater Beast had seen through this world!

It would never leave the Spirit Beast Pavilion!

Ling Fei looked at the Iron-Eater Beast, still facing the wall, and said awkwardly, "Xiao Jin, you can choose another. This one doesn't seem too willing."

"Yeah yeah, it's not willing. Xiao Jin, don't bother with it."

"I'm well-behaved, cute, and very willing!"

The other spirit beasts started chattering again.

The Iron-Eater Beast ground its teeth.

Traitors! Groveling in front of humans for favor! You disgrace the word 'beast'!

"How about picking another?" Ling Fei suggested gently. "This Iron-Eater Beast was abandoned once. It's especially wary of humans, so it probably won't follow you easily."

The Iron-Eater Beast stiffened, but didn't respond.

If this girl just left now...

It might feel a little disappointed.

But.

Better to stay free than be hurt again.

Yun Jin looked at the Iron-Eater Beast's back and spoke softly. "Being abandoned wasn't its fault, it was the human's fault. If you choose to contract a spirit beast, then you've made a promise to become partners. To me, a partner is someone you never give up on. If it's willing to form a contract with me, I'll work hard with it, and we'll grow stronger together."

The Iron-Eater Beast trembled, struggling not to turn around.

Yun Jin continued, "By the way, wasn't the one who abandoned it a disciple of Tianxing Sect? He thought the Iron-Eater Beast wasn't strong enough, right? Then if I contract with it, I'll train it to be the strongest in the world. After that, I'll parade it in front of that disciple every day until he regrets it so much he wants to slam his head into a wall."

The Iron-Eater Beast's eyes suddenly lit up.

That... actually sounded kind of satisfying.

"Elder Ling, if it still doesn't want to, then let's leave it be for now. I don't want to choose another spirit beast either. Maybe I'll focus on cultivating myself first, and come back to pick one later," Yun Jin said.

Ling Fei was stunned. "When exactly would 'later' be?"

"No idea. Could be a year, two years, ten years. Who knows?" Yun Jin said calmly.

That long?

Ling Fei was just about to say something.

But the Iron-Eater Beast suddenly whipped around!