Unintended Immortality

At dawn, just before the fifth watch, someone arrived outside the door. It was none other than Advisor Zhang.

He seemed to have something urgent to discuss but dared not disturb Song You’s sleep. After asking the soldier standing guard if the Daoist was awake and receiving a negative reply, Advisor Zhang began pacing back and forth outside.

The sound of his quick, light footsteps clearly reflected his anxious state.

Inside the house, the calico cat was curled up on the bed, her entire body wrapped in the blanket with only her head peeking out. She stared wide-eyed toward the door.

After hesitating for a long time, she finally turned around and woke the Daoist.

“Meow…”

The Daoist opened his eyes, glanced outside, and immediately understood what was happening. Without saying much, he got up and dressed.

The cloth he had used to wash his face the night before was still damp. He grabbed it and casually wiped his face. The stark temperature difference between day and night on the plains made the cloth icy cold, instantly refreshing him.

When he opened the door, the night outside was still heavy with darkness. Lanterns flickered, and Advisor Zhang, pacing back and forth, turned toward him at the sound.

“I am,” Song You replied calmly, looking at him. “Advisor Zhang, you’re waiting outside in the cold. Does something urgent require my attention?”

“A few generals who were previously afflicted by demonic spells suddenly had their symptoms flare up. They’re in severe pain, and we have no means to help them. We could only come to ask for your assistance.”

“Please, lead the way.”

“This way.”

Song You turned back to close the door behind him and followed Advisor Zhang.

The sky had yet to brighten.

In these times, aside from the minority in bustling places like Changjing or Yidu who enjoyed nightlife, most people’s evenings were uneventful. After nightfall, unless occupied with marital conversations or other diversions, people often went to bed early but rarely slept until full daylight.

As a result, many officials were already up and about by the fifth watch. And in the military, where arranging the camp and moving was sometimes necessary, rising early was common practice.

Song You followed Advisor Zhang through the streets and alleys.

Everywhere, torches burned brightly.

As they walked, Advisor Zhang spoke, “I hope I haven’t disturbed your rest, Mr. Song.”

“If it’s a matter involving demons or evil spirits, there’s no need for courtesy, sir. Simply state the issue.”

“Mr. Song, your selflessness is admirable,” Advisor Zhang said, pausing briefly before resuming his hurried steps, his mouth continuing nonstop. “Do you remember those large hornets that could transform into walnuts and grow bigger from yesterday?”

“I remember.”

“The hornets raised by that demon come in two types, one red and one yellow. The yellow ones are what you encountered yesterday—they can grow large, fly, and attack people. The red ones, however, can burrow into a person’s body and latch onto their spine,” Advisor Zhang explained as they walked.

He continued, “Previously, many officers and soldiers in the army had already fallen victim to them. These creatures don’t harm people quickly or aggressively. Most of the time, it’s as if nothing is wrong—they just make the person weak.

“But when strength is needed, the victim experiences excruciating pain, rendering them unable to fight. Rarely do they take lives. Since you only arrived the day before yesterday and have been busy since, we didn’t trouble you with it immediately.

“However, perhaps because you destroyed those hundreds of yellow hornets yesterday and provoked the demon, things changed. Last night, after darkness fell, all the walnut-sized growths on the officers’ bodies swelled and began to act up. The pain became unbearable, and some officers are now in agony, crying out as if on the verge of death. I had no choice but to come to you before dawn.”

“I see...” Song You nodded.

It seemed that the people in the city were still unaware that the demon had already been slain. They probably assumed that yesterday he had merely neutralized the demon’s attack. From the looks of it, the walnuts were closely tied to the demon. With the demon dead, the walnuts were now reacting violently.

Before long, the two men and one cat arrived at a building.

Inside, a row of wooden beds had been set up. Each bed held a burly man lying prone under a blanket, with attendants by their sides.

Even before entering, the air was filled with groans and cries of pain.

“Argh…”

“Ouch…”

The sounds came from the burly men lying on the beds.

“Lift the blanket so Mr. Song can take a look.”

“Yes, sir!”

A soldier immediately and carefully pulled back a blanket.

Beneath it was a man with a broad chest and muscular shoulders. Though a layer of fat covered his torso, his robust physique was still evident. Yet this powerful-looking man lay prone on the bed in visible agony.

On his lower back, near his spine, was a swollen lump about the size of a fist, red and glistening. To the untrained eye, it might easily be mistaken for an enormous blister.

What was more unsettling was that the swollen lump was pulsing.

The calico cat, curious as always and eager to see everything, stood upright on the wooden bed. She propped herself up with her front paws as she leaned in for a closer look.

Song You carefully examined the lump as well, reaching out to gently touch it.

“Argh…”

The burly man lying prone immediately grimaced in pain, baring his teeth.

“How many in the army are afflicted by this spell?” Song You asked, counting the eleven beds in the room.

The calico cat glanced at the man whose face was twisted in pain, then at Song You, and finally at the large lump on the man’s back. She seemed tempted to reach out and touch it to see if it would hurt as much if she were the one to poke it.

Unfortunately, just as her paw stretched out, the Daoist caught it and pulled it back.

“These eleven are just the generals,” Advisor Zhang said with a bitter expression. “There are dozens of junior officers, and perhaps another few dozen or even a hundred soldiers, all lying in the infirmary.

“For a time, that demon loved to lurk in the shadows, sending hornets to target commanding officers leading charges or particularly brave soldiers. Some sharp-eyed officers managed to strike the hornets down with weapons, but in the chaos of battle, many didn’t notice in time or failed to react quickly enough and got hit. Only after the army became more vigilant did things improve somewhat.”

“That many…”

“Exactly!”

“Has the army’s medical officers tried anything?”

“They’ve tried quite a few methods—herbs, acupuncture, talismans—you name it. For soldiers on the verge of dying from the pain, they even attempted to cut the lump out or smash it with tools. But the lump is fused with the spine. By the time it’s destroyed or removed, the person is already dead. Several medical officers said that even if Doctor Cai were here in person, there might not be a cure.”

“Fused with the spine...” Song You frowned deeply upon hearing this.

Perhaps even Doctor Cai would find this troublesome.

“Mr. Song...”

“Sir, don’t worry,” Song You replied, his frown quickly relaxing. He spoke with calm assurance, “Though this demonic spell is indeed difficult to deal with, I do have a solution.”

“Please enlighten us, sir.”

“These walnut-like growths remain dormant on the officers’ bodies because they know they cannot be removed. They parasitize their hosts comfortably, slowly absorbing their blood, qi and vitality. When their hunger is satisfied or when the time comes, they activate and leave.

“I can cast a spell to temporarily pacify them. However, to remove them entirely, we’ll need assistance from a true master in the military.”

“Who might this master be, capable of such a feat?”

“The temple I’m from possesses an ancestral treasure called the Quzai Vine, which specializes in dispelling calamities,” Song You explained. “Unfortunately, the temple is thousands of li from here.”

“I see,” Advisor Zhang said with a nod.

Advisor Zhang immediately understood and turned to shout to those outside, “Quickly, summon Mr. Jiang from the Special Talents Division!”

“Yes, sir!”

Someone immediately took the order and hurried away.

Song You withdrew his gaze and turned to look at the generals in the room.

He then instructed the soldiers to lift the blankets from the generals one by one. With a wave of his hand, he cast a spell, scattering streams of bright white light that descended onto the swollen lumps on the generals’ spines.

The room was soon filled with groans of relief.

The generals, who had previously felt a burning, throbbing pain in their backs, suddenly experienced a cooling sensation, as if a block of ice had been placed on a spot scorched by fire. The sudden comfort made some of them cry out in surprise.

Before long, a sleepy-looking Big Belly Jiang entered the room, following the soldier who had fetched him.

“Advisor Zhang—oh, Mr. Song is here as well. What’s the matter, and how can I be of service?”

“We need you to use your extraordinary divine powers to retrieve something,” Advisor Zhang said, then asked, “Is your treasure chest available today, Mr. Jiang?”

“Where am I going, and what am I retrieving?” Big Belly Jiang immediately snapped out of his drowsiness, asking curiously.

Advisor Zhang turned to look at Song You, and Big Belly Jiang followed suit.

“Mr. Jiang, have you ever been to Yizhou, in Lingquan County of Zhuo Commandery?” Song You asked.

“I make a living with this skill of mine,” Big Belly Jiang said with a grin. “Sometimes, when I’m bored at night, I enjoy astral traveling to different places. I’ve roughly seen much of the world, so I consider myself quite familiar with the route. Within Great Yan’s borders, there are 1,800 counties. I can’t claim to have been to every single one, but I’ve visited most of them.

“As for Zhuo Commandery’s Lingquan County, I’ve naturally been there. However, my travels are quick and imprecise. If you require me to go to a specific location, I’d need to make a special trip to scout it properly. If so, you’ll have to provide me with detailed directions.”

“It’s in Lingquan County, Zhuo Commandery,” Song You began, “Head southeast out of the county, following the main road. After passing nine earthen watch towers, take a small path on the right. Two li down the path, you’ll find a village. Go through the village and follow the stream upstream. There, you’ll find Yin-Yang Mountain. On the mountain is a Daoist temple called Hidden Dragon Temple.”

Knowing that Big Belly Jiang astral traveled quickly and couldn’t ask for directions en route, Song You gave exceptionally detailed instructions. “I’d like to ask you to make this journey.”

“I’ve got it. But I’ll have to wait until tonight,” Big Belly Jiang replied. “The distance to Zhuo Commandery is several thousand li. I’ll need to set off as soon as it gets dark. I’ll have to rush with all my might and avoid taking any wrong turns to make it in time. I’ll rest in a bamboo grove during the day, and I should be able to return by the morning after tomorrow.”

“That won’t be necessary,” Song You said. “I’ll imbue you with a strand of spiritual energy to allow you to travel by day without being harmed by sunlight or heat.”

“Really?” Big Belly Jiang’s eyes widened.

“I wouldn’t dare deceive you,” Song You assured him, pausing briefly before continuing. “However, when you reach Yin-Yang Mountain, if you can’t find the temple, call my name loudly and explain that I sent you. When you reach the temple, I must ask you to exercise great caution and avoid reckless behavior.”

“Don't worry!” Big Belly Jiang grinned. “Since you’re from that temple, I naturally wouldn’t dare be disrespectful!”

“Sorry to trouble you, Mr. Jiang.”

Song You couldn’t help but think of his master, whose temperament was notoriously difficult—ill-tempered and easily irritated, with a strong dislike for being disturbed. Who knew what she might be doing at this moment?

If Mr. Jiang wandered off there, being a ghost with no rights, and with a personality as careless as Xing Wu's, he might upset the old Daoist. If he was mistaken for a bothersome yin spirit, wouldn’t a single yawn from the Daoist be enough to erase him?

“But once I’m there, what should I say?”

“Just tell them I need 300 seeds of the Quzai Vine to break a demonic spell and save lives,” Song You instructed.

“Ask them to place 300 Quzai Vine… Quzai Vine seeds into the small chest when it appears,” Big Belly Jiang added, repeating the term “Quzai Vine” carefully to ensure he wouldn’t get it wrong.

“Yes, please remember, Mr. Jiang—your words must be respectful.”

“Got it!”

“Wait a moment…”

“Is there anything else, Mr. Song?”

“Never mind, it’s nothing. You can go now.”

“Alright!”

Big Belly Jiang, unhurried as ever, found an empty bed. He gave a few instructions to those around him, and lay down on the spot.

He pulled the blanket over himself, closed his eyes, and in no time, his soul left his body. Grinning, his soul greeted the Daoist and even playfully reached out as if to ruffle Advisor Zhang’s hair.

The Daoist released a surge of spiritual energy, causing the fat man’s soul to tremble and his eyes to light up. Only then did Song You cup his hands in a salute and remind him to take care on his journey.