Delusive Fate

※This chapter contains detailed descriptions of scenes that may trigger trauma, including extreme choices. Please use caution when reading.

#078

What Jung Yi-dam wants to know is what kind of reasoning led Ki Baek-woo to make such a decision.

Ki Baek-woo, fallen from a high place, resembled a broken tomato sauce bottle. Jung Yi-dam’s teary eyes lingered on that scene for a long time. He thought it was enchanting. It seemed like the most beautiful sight of Ki Baek-woo he had ever seen.

Why did he die? Jung Yi-dam wondered. No, he knows why he died. It’s because of Lee Han-sol. He recalled the Ki Baek-woo he had seen recently. The look of bewilderment, as if suddenly struck on the back of the head.

‘Hey, our hyung… Where is Han-sol hyung… No.’

Ki Baek-woo, who until recently had coldly pronounced the name “Lee Han-sol,” now pitifully stammered it. As if feeling pressure while calling that name, his previously straight chest and shoulders curled inward. He couldn’t even speak properly. His trembling fingers rubbed his cheek, then tightly gripped near his heart. Ki Baek-woo staggered up and hurriedly headed for the entrance.

At that time, Ki Baek-woo acted like someone whose entire body was filled with the urgent need to see Lee Han-sol right now. One didn’t need to split his body in half to know that much. Toward the anxious Ki Baek-woo, Jung Yi-dam clearly said, “Your hyung is dead.”

Of course, Ki Baek-woo didn’t answer. He was too busy ignoring it and rushing out in a frenzy.

If that Ki Baek-woo was found dead like this shortly after, and if it seemed far from being an unfortunate accident, one could only think it happened because of Lee Han-sol. What Jung Yi-dam wants to know is what sweet thoughts he had about Lee Han-sol that led him to his death.

Was he sorry? Did he feel guilty towards Lee Han-sol as buried memories resurfaced? Or… was he angry? He might not have been able to forgive himself for looking for Jung Yi-dam in front of Lee Han-sol, whether due to the system or something else.

Given how things turned out, Jung Yi-dam now has to admit it. All along, Ki Baek-woo hadn’t loved him. The man who blushed in front of Jung Yi-dam and had eyes that sparkled as if he could do anything. Ki Baek-woo, who seemed to find his past time with Lee Han-sol shameful because he loved Jung Yi-dam too much. It was all just created by the system.

‘A crude and shabby fake…. Such a thing shouldn’t even be described as love, not even metaphorically.’

However, Jung Yi-dam wasn’t displeased at all. His heart stirred in front of the lifeless Ki Baek-woo. It was closer to joy. A joy so great it was exciting….

‘Because Ki Baek-woo kept thinking… that he shouldn’t do this.’

Despite the contradiction, Jung Yi-dam was constantly gripped by this uncomfortable anxiety throughout his pursuit of Ki Baek-woo. Even if the whole world treated Lee Han-sol coldly, shouldn’t Ki Baek-woo, of all people, not do that? Such thoughts would suddenly well up, as if testing his patience.

Once the pursuit began, the targets, including Jung Yi-dam, couldn’t do anything on their own. Just as all rights come with obligations, those made special by the system had to faithfully follow it. When the story starts, everything must flow within the pre-arranged settings. Every line, every gesture. This was a fact that Jung Yi-dam, the protagonist, knew better than anyone. But still.

‘There’s nothing inevitable in the face of love. If it’s inevitable, it’s not love but compromise. That doesn’t even deserve an excuse. Besides, Ki Baek-woo….’

Lee Han-sol is giving him that much love. While receiving such love, not being able to overcome even one system. How dare someone who can’t even do that much claim to love? Do you think someone who betrays even Lee Han-sol like that won’t change after the ending? That’s impossible. Such an expectation is too foolish.

Jung Yi-dam always suffered from a vague uncertainty that even Ki Baek-woo, whom he thought was his last bastion, would ultimately disappoint him just like the others. His mind was always complicated.

But as of today, all doubts have disappeared. When Lee Han-sol died before the ending, Jung Yi-dam felt relieved in front of that scene. It was a freshness as if a huge sin weighing on his shoulders was being forgiven. Love exists. That certainty that Lee Han-sol gave him made him feel as light as a feather. And now, Jung Yi-dam felt a similar relief in front of Ki Baek-woo’s death.

Ki Baek-woo is different. He’s a different breed from the insignificant ones he pursued before. Ki Baek-woo knows how to love. He loves Lee Han-sol. Although he wasn’t in his right mind due to being a slave to fate, and made many irreparable mistakes… Moreover, he didn’t even know they were mistakes and pushed Lee Han-sol to the edge of the cliff and beyond… But it’s okay.

Because he died like this.

Not just mouthing off that it’s better to die if it’s not you, but actually dying because Lee Han-sol is gone.

‘So, in the end, this is also an arrangement by the angel for me….’

Jung Yi-dam closed his eyes as he looked at Ki Baek-woo’s corpse, with various fluids flowing, after jumping from the old apartment. He recalled his own little angel. Lee Han-sol, who shone brightly and said to him, “Believe in love.” He willingly died after giving Jung Yi-dam that tremendous teaching. And Ki Baek-woo, who had stayed by Lee Han-sol’s side for a long time… is now dead like this because he loved Lee Han-sol. He atoned with his life for Lee Han-sol, for Jung Yi-dam’s angel. So this too was a milestone prepared by Lee Han-sol for Jung Yi-dam.

Love, people who know how to love, everything is precisely prepared. So I just need to make Ki Baek-woo like me. It might take quite some time to turn Ki Baek-woo’s heart away from Lee Han-sol, but it doesn’t matter. Because he’ll end up loving me anyway. Because I’m the most special being in the world, and I also have an angel who takes care of me so I don’t lose my way….

Jung Yi-dam’s vision finally brightened. It was when quite some time had passed, and Ki Baek-woo’s blood had almost completely seeped into the sidewalk tiles. Only then did someone discover them, or more precisely, Ki Baek-woo lying face down in front of Jung Yi-dam, and screamed.

“Help, help…! There’s a person here, Ki, Hunter Ki Baek-woo…!”

There was a brief commotion. Belatedly, an ambulance came, and the police arrived. They recognized Ki Baek-woo and were shocked, then frowned as if his condition was terrible.

How uncultured. Making such expressions in front of a beautiful scene that’s hard to see anywhere…. Jung Yi-dam inwardly sneered like that, but he sincerely answered the police officer’s various questions.

How long Ki Baek-woo had been out of contact after going out a few days ago, what he had done to find him, and what he had heard at the center he visited today. According to a center staff member he met in passing, Ki Baek-woo had been asking about the whereabouts of Lee Han-sol, who had already been processed as killed in action.

‘Was it two days ago, or three days ago…? Anyway, someone from the Hunter Management Team came and talked about Hunter Lee Han-sol. Since he died in action at the gate, I guided him to the Special Veterans Affairs Office. They manage the memorial altar and columbarium for those killed in action, you know. I thought Hunter Ki was obviously asking about the joint memorial altar… But he said something strange?’

‘What did he say?’

‘What was it? Did he ask if his hyung had transferred to the Special Veterans Affairs Office? Then he suddenly left before I could answer. Ah, but Healer, you don’t need to go to the Veterans Affairs Office.’

‘Why?’

‘Even if you go, you won’t hear anything special. I’m telling you this because I know you and Hunter Ki are close…. From what I heard from the Veterans Affairs people, Hunter Ki Baek-woo had already swept through there that day.’

‘What do you mean by swept through?’

‘Hunter Ki kept asking strange questions there too, like when did his hyung start working here… They said it was troublesome. They didn’t understand what he was talking about, so they just showed him the location of Hunter Lee’s memorial altar and columbarium niche, but he got really angry.’

‘He got angry? Why?’

‘That’s what I’m saying. At the memorial altar, he saw the portrait photo… He seriously complained that they were holding a memorial service using an ID photo of someone who was alive and well. Then when they showed him the urn at the columbarium, he caused a scene again… Completely crazy, no, slightly not normal, no, sigh…. Anyway, they said it was scary. And then….’

‘Yes?’

‘Later, they found out that Hunter Ki had stolen Hunter Lee’s portrait photo and urn…? Anyway, it’s the first time the Veterans Affairs Office has dealt with something like this, so they’ve been trying to contact Hunter Ki, but there’s been no word since then.’

So you don’t need to go there. They won’t have anything to tell you either.

After hearing the center staff’s words that ended like that, Jung Yi-dam came here. The old apartment where Lee Han-sol and Ki Baek-woo lived together, whose address he had found out before the ending. Jung Yi-dam rang the doorbell in front of the old-fashioned, shabby-looking entrance door. He knocked. No response. Jung Yi-dam stood quietly in the silence, gauging various things.

Why did Ki Baek-woo come here? Does he think Lee Han-sol will return if he waits? Does he think he can meet and apologize? What is he doing alone, holding Lee Han-sol’s empty urn, who disappeared into the monster’s stomach without leaving a single hair? Have I failed again this time? Can only the angel do love? If so, why can’t he give it to me… Why isn’t Lee Han-sol a target for pursuit? Anyway, what is Ki Baek-woo doing, holed up like this?

Jung Yi-dam, who had been recalling the events until just now with his eyes closed, looked up at the sudden voice asking, “So?” Opening his eyes, he saw a police officer busily scribbling something in a notebook. He had an ambiguous expression as if he couldn’t quite empathize with Jung Yi-dam’s story. When Jung Yi-dam didn’t respond, the police officer raised an eyebrow and asked again.

“So? You say you just waited in front of the door for about an hour and then left?”

“Yes.”

“Please continue.”

Jung Yi-dam smiled gently and gave his final answer.

“That’s all…. As I gave up and came out, suddenly, thud, he fell from the sky.”

“What?”

“Hunter Ki Baek-woo. He just fell right in front of my feet. Like a surprise gift.”

Though not a prettily wrapped gift. Jung Yi-dam muttered as if talking to himself.

He was still very curious. What kind of romantic thoughts did Ki Baek-woo repeatedly have before making such a choice? Was he so sorry to Lee Han-sol that he couldn’t live, or did he miss him? Maybe he thought that if Lee Han-sol had died, he should naturally die too, without much meaning. Everything was enchanting. What Jung Yi-dam regretted was that no one but himself would remember this beautiful situation.

In any case, now that Ki Baek-woo’s body had been recovered, Jung Yi-dam no longer needed to be here. It was time to do what needed to be done.

“Healer Jung Yi-dam?”

Jung Yi-dam put on a very apologetic expression to the police officer urging him. Then, bowing his head politely, he answered.

“I’m sorry, but I have more urgent matters to attend to, so I need to go now. Take care, officer.”

It was time to start a new pursuit.