I Can Hear the Saint’s Inner Thoughts

76 – Please Always Think of Me First (1)

Victoria looked at me drinking and clicked her tongue, making a “tsk” sound. It seemed she was displeased that I had broken my promise with her.

Sharp sparks flew from Victoria’s eyes, and she deliberately sat down next to me with a loud thud.

“Victoria, how did you…”

“You weren’t back at the lodging even when it was almost dark.”

Seeing her wrapping her arms around me on purpose and rubbing her chest against me, I couldn’t help but shudder. Victoria was jealous even of the men I was friendly with now.

– I’m glad I followed him, just in case. I almost lost Astar… I won’t let him go anymore.

Reading her inner thoughts, it seemed Victoria had been following my movements from the start. I was at a loss for what to do about her increasingly intense obsession.

“Am I perhaps intruding on something?”

“No! We were just talking about you!”

Gractar was laughing heartily at Victoria. His ability to deal with her so calmly, even though she was scary when angry, was almost admirable.

“Oh my, what could you possibly have been talking about so animatedly….”

– Judging by what I heard earlier and how she’s treating Astal favorably, she doesn’t seem like a bad demon…. Well, protecting her husband’s external honor is a wife’s duty, after all.

Victoria was hiding her mouth with her hand, smiling as if she were shy. Seeing her act so concerned with appearances, something she never did when it was just the two of us, felt awkward.

“Astal was saying he’s pushing your feelings away like a coward, so I was just advising him to act more like a man!”

“……”

I was speechless at Glaktar’s comment. After all, even after rejecting Victoria’s confession, I was worried about hurting her.

I couldn’t lift my head, thinking about how timid and passive I was, to a degree that no one could understand.

“I actually like that gentleness of yours, Astal. In the end, you’re only pushing me away because you’re afraid I’ll lose my life.”

Victoria lightly kissed my cheek and smiled. She didn’t seem frightened at all, even with a muscular orc barbarian standing right in front of her.

Yeah, that’s just who Victoria Everhart was.

“…Even if you were to hate me, my fervent affections will never change, so I will simply wait endlessly.”

To put it harshly, she was self-righteous; to put it kindly, a noble saintess.

A human who would stubbornly walk her own path, even if an unendurable misfortune were to befall her life.

“Hahaha! You’re a perfectly matched pair! I don’t understand why he even came to me for advice!”

Glaktar seemed pleased with Victoria’s answer, as he chugged his drink and let out a refreshing exhale.

“Might I perhaps inquire as to your name?”

“My name is Glaktar! I’m the orc barbarian who just became friends with this guy!”

He extended a massive hand towards Victoria, asking for a handshake, but she shook her head as if regretful.

“I am Victoria Everhart, the Saintess of Flowers. I apologize, but I am not permitted to have physical contact with other men…”

“Is it because of the Celestial Deity? Well, that goddess would definitely do that!”

Originally, Gractar, while watching Victoria unable to get close to men due to the rules of the celestial Lumina, scratched his chin and spoke as if he knew something.

“Do you know something about the celestial being?”

“Of course! This is the Demon Realm! In the first place, the demon god Serena is her sister!”

Then Gractar chuckled, reeling off stories he knew, tales of the demon god Serena and the demonic god Abyssys, the objects of worship here, unlike the continent.

“Wait, is that real? Celestial and demon god are sisters? I’ve never heard anything like that before.”

My eyes widened instantly. In the mural I saw in the Saint Kingdom’s forbidden library last time, I felt like I was starting to grasp why all the other gods were hostile to one being.

“Of course it wouldn’t be known on the continent. In the first place, just as there is shadow when there is light, these two are opposing but inseparable…”

“…The good and evil of life cannot be distinguished, so we must bear the shadow and go toward the light.”

It’s a passage from the Bible that Victoria often recited. Recalling that sentence, I realized the connection with Serena, called the god of darkness and night.

The gods maintain the balance of this world, and if that example is the values of good and evil… or something else, it wasn’t impossible.

“That’s right! There’s an opposite verse in the Demon Realm! ‘We must bear the light and return to the darkness!'”

Gractar nodded his head vigorously at what I said, agreeing with me. Indeed, being the first friendly being I met in the Demon Realm, he had an abundance of information to offer.

“I have no interest in heretical doctrines. Aren’t they ultimately beings who brutally massacre and violate people?”

– You trust people too easily, even though the other person might be lying? And the saintess of the celestial Lumina is right next to you…

Victoria bit her lower lip slightly as she heard those words.

No matter how much Victoria offered prayers to the enemy and comforted the dying, there was no way that the saintess of the celestial being would have any interest in the opposing evil god.

She was the one who took the lead in smashing Serena’s statues with a hammer, and tried to kill the succubi who were pretending to be clerics.

“…Even if it’s a crooked path, I think there’s something to learn, so I apologize if I forced it on you.”

“……!!!”

*KWAANG!*

Glakhtar, seeing Victoria’s reaction, immediately slammed his head on the table, apologizing. A bit of blood trickled from his forehead, but he didn’t seem to care.

“No, you really didn’t have to…”

“You are the Holy Woman of the hero party representing humans. A being living a life completely opposite of the Dullahan here. If I misspoke, apologizing is the right thing to do!”

It was a truly orcish, simple-minded action, but seeing Glakhtar’s attitude actually made his words more believable.

In this demon realm of deceit and betrayal, someone this trustworthy was rare. He was displaying a distinct difference from the demons and devils I had met so far.

“…Victoria, how about you have a drink too? These kinds of stories are hard to tell sober.”

“Are you finally trying to make me an accomplice? You completely forgot about telling me to abstain from alcohol all the time, didn’t you?”

Victoria gripped my arm even tighter, physically showing how upset she was that I forgot our promise.

“Yeah, I just want to drink with you today, that’s all.”

“…What did you just say?”

“Why, is it so strange to want to share a drink with my lover?”

I looked at Victoria, holding up my glass. If I didn’t express my feelings to her like this, I felt like I’d truly regret it someday, just like Glakhtar said.

“……”

– He said lover, he said lover, he said lover….

Victoria’s eyes widened for a moment, then she cleared her throat a few times, trying not to seem flustered, calming her startled heart.

“You’re showing a side of yourself that’s unusual, one that appreciates the atmosphere. Fine. I’ll indulge you.”

*Glug glug.*

Victoria downed the drink I poured her right away, and Glakhtar, seeing that, was already ordering more snacks and alcohol.

“Hey, owner! Bring us some well-done Metalbird meat and a well-fermented fruit liquor! I’m buying!”

“I didn’t want to be in debt to you like this.”

“What nonsense! You’re already showing me something beautiful. I even hope you two become a love that wasn’t meant to be.”

Graktaar was looking at Victoria and me with the warm, approving eyes of a parent, a soft smile playing on his lips.

Knowing that he was someone who could have originally been our enemy, yet seeing him cheer on our love,

I wanted to be a little braver.

If I survive this arena, if that brings me even closer to the possibility of killing the Demon King….

Wouldn’t it be okay to tell Victoria how I truly feel? I was having that slightly selfish thought.

“Astal-nim, no matter what, shouldn’t you always prioritize me, who’s cuter than your friend…?”

Victoria leaned her head on my shoulder on purpose, slurring her words as she spoke of the complaints she’d been holding back.

“…What did you say?”

“Right here, I, the cutest Victoria of all, am right beside you.”

Victoria’s face was flushed red, perhaps from the alcohol, and unlike usual, she was even rubbing her face against my chest, acting all cutesy.

“…Please always prioritize me.”

– Pretend to be drunk and tell Astal-nim all the things I couldn’t say or the feelings I couldn’t express, and then seduce him in bed later…! We can just say it was an accident caused by being drunk….!

Hearing Victoria’s sly inner thoughts, I could immediately tell that she wasn’t drunk at all.