I Have a Girlfriend in Marvel

Thor had shut himself off, ignoring all questions thrown his way.

Coulson was at a loss. No amount of persuasion, coaxing, or threats could get Thor to talk. In the end, he had no choice but to give up.

"Sir, should we give him a little… incentive?"

One of Coulson's subordinates suggested. As agents, they had plenty of ways to make someone talk—it just depended on whether they were willing to use them.

Coulson shook his head. "Not yet. We'll find another way. In the meantime, investigate his travel records. See where else he's been besides Los Angeles and who he's been in contact with."

"Yes, sir!"

The subordinate left, and another agent approached.

"Sir, there's been a bank robbery in District 19, with gunfire reported. Should we intervene?"

If Coulson had a worse temper, he might've slapped him on the spot.

"We're S.H.I.E.L.D., not the police. Bank robberies aren't our jurisdiction. Besides, do you think we have enough manpower to handle every little problem right now?"

The agent shook his head. "Understood. It's just that this robbery was… unusual, so I thought I should report it."

"Let's hear it," Coulson said, rubbing his temples.

The agent replied, "There were six robbers, all wearing masks. In the end, only one escaped with the money."

"Six came, five died. Which bank was this? Their security must be top-notch, on par with S.H.I.E.L.D.," Coulson quipped sarcastically.

The agent's expression turned strange. "No, sir. The bank's security was average and was quickly neutralized. The robbers killed each other…"

Coulson's brows furrowed. "Details."

"Yes, sir!"

At the same time, Gwen was scrolling through the latest news online while venting to Su Ye.

"The news says the robbers all wore clown masks. They killed each other during the heist, leaving just one guy to escape with the money—by school bus, no less."

On Gwen's screen was an image of a man with grotesque clown makeup, his red lips twisted into a grin that barely concealed scars stretching to his ears.

"A lot of money was stolen, and so many people died. My dad's going to be swamped with this case!" Gwen sighed.

The robbery happened in District 19, which happened to be under the jurisdiction of Gwen's father, Captain George Stacy.

Su Ye leaned over to take a look, his brows furrowing immediately.

The sudden appearance of a heavily made-up clown who killed all his accomplices and escaped with the loot didn't surprise Su Ye much.

Catwoman's "girlfriend card" had been activated for days, and Batman's gear had been upgraded multiple times. The Joker—Batman's nemesis—showing up was inevitable. It would've been strange if he hadn't.

What puzzled Su Ye was the use of a school bus in the heist. It had backed out from a tightly packed convoy, smashed into the bank, and afterward, the Joker drove it back into the convoy, seamlessly blending in as the entire fleet passed right by the police.

Were those buses driven by robots? Autonomous vehicles? Or were all the drivers in the convoy working for the Joker?

The movies never explained it, but Su Ye figured that if Captain Stacy wanted to track the Joker, starting with the school bus drivers or the bus company might yield results faster.

As for himself, Su Ye had no intention of going after the Joker just yet.

The Joker, well… how should one put it?

In Su Ye's opinion, the Joker was a twisted, morally bankrupt, chaotic lunatic. Aside from having a hot girlfriend who hated wearing too much and delivering some iconic costume-change scenes, there was little to praise about him.

An absolute villain, hell-bent on spreading his chaos and destroying order. Yet, so many people idolized him, flooding forums with Joker memes. Su Ye honestly couldn't understand the appeal.

Praising the actor's performance was fair—his portrayal was outstanding, especially posthumously. But jumping on the bandwagon to idolize the Joker, calling him "Lord Joker," was completely unnecessary.

If this were in China, a character like that wouldn't last two episodes.

But this was America, and the Joker was a product of its societal environment. Su Ye could only offer his best wishes.

The Joker, like the Green Goblin, was a side effect of Su Ye activating his "girlfriend cards." By that logic, he should take responsibility, as he did with the Green Goblin.

But people change.

Besides, the Joker's insanity stemmed from his discontent with societal norms and government systems. He sought to dismantle the establishment to achieve true freedom and equality—an anarchist at heart.

In some ways, Su Ye even agreed with the Joker's methods.

Of course, he'd never admit it out loud.

"Ye, let's help my dad catch this criminal and protect New York's peace!" Gwen said, looking at Su Ye with a serious expression.

"No problem. Upholding justice is our duty," Su Ye nodded quickly. After all, you had to keep the ladies happy.

Then, his tone shifted. "However, the Joker may be chaotic and arrogant, but he's no fool. So, especially you, don't act rashly. If you find anything, report to me first!"

"Compared to Captain Stacy or New York's safety, I'm more concerned about your well-being. Do you understand?"

"Mm-hmm." Touched, Gwen nodded and leaned in for a kiss. And then...

Two hours later…

Exhausted, Gwen fell into a deep sleep. Su Ye tucked her in before jumping out the window.

By now, it was late at night. Although Su Ye was feeling worn out himself, there was an urgent issue that needed addressing.

In the underground Batcave, Dr. Fox, who had received Su Ye's call, was waiting for him, along with the old butler Alfred.

"Young master, coming by this late—something urgent?" Alfred asked.

Su Ye adjusted his collar to hide the marks on his neck and nodded. "Yes, there's an issue. Here's the situation…"

When Su Ye explained how he and the newly emerged female Spider-Man had an inexplicable mutual attraction that inevitably led to physical intimacy, both old men's faces lit up with intrigue.

Clearly, no matter their age, men remain curious creatures, eager for details.

"So, I need your help to find a way to suppress this… trait," Su Ye concluded.

Dr. Fox was puzzled. "Why suppress it? If you need, I could recommend some supplements—highly effective, no side effects."

He chuckled smugly, "I'm over seventy, and with this, I could repopulate the world—father a hundred kids in three years, no problem."

Su Ye facepalmed. What kind of nonsense are these old guys spouting? I don't need supplements. And seriously, you're a scientist—have some dignity! Don't turn into some sleazy, unhinged character.