Re:Zero kara Hajimeru Isekai Seikatsu web novel

　He was roughly dragged to the front of the tomb and thrown out near the entrance, where he tumbled about.

　Subaru spat out the unpleasant sensation of something like snow or frost getting into his mouth, and as his exposed skin mistook the pain for numbness, he turned his head.

"That's pretty rough handling."

"I'm not smart enough to be considerate. It's better than you being treated roughly. Or is it this woman who is being treated roughly?"

　Lying on his side and looking down at Subaru, Garfiel exhales white breath and ostentatiously shows off Rem in his arms.

　It is unclear whether Garfiel had thought of the idea of ​​a hostage, but it certainly could have been used as a means to blackmail Subaru.

"Don't do anything strange to Rem."

"As long as you're willing to comply with our demands, I'll do that."

　Saying this in a quiet voice, Subaru placed his hands on the thinly snow-covered ground and, using his numb hands, somehow managed to stand up. Standing beside him was the clone of Lewes who had carried him here, gazing blankly in his direction.

　He still looked shabby, clad only in rags. In this cold weather, his equipment seemed too shabby.

"Can't you do something about the way these kids are dressed? ...It looks cold, there's no need to look at them."

"You know what these guys are like, right? No one who can sense the cold would stick with them in the first place. If we're just trying to buy time, there's no reason to join in."

"Don't be shy. I don't think the situation will improve if we just buy time."

　In the midst of a blizzard of visibility, Subaru listens to Garfiel's warning and turns towards the tomb.

　A lonely stone ruin in a world of white smoke. Echidna's Tomb stands tall in the face of the raging natural phenomena, its mouth agape and ominously open, waiting for challengers.

　Emilia should be among them.

"How long has it been since Emilia joined us?"

"It started the night before yesterday, so it's almost the second day. Honestly, as long as he's not dead, I don't care what happens."

"I suppose that's true, given your position. ...Wasn't there an option for you to go in and pull him out?"

"I can't enter the tomb. That's what the contract says."

　It's an all-encompassing phrase, and that's Garfiel's whole position.

　It is unclear how many of the Sanctuary's inhabitants know this, but Garfiel has certainly stepped into the Tomb, met Echidna, gained the rights of an Apostle of Greed, and is now qualified to take command of Lewes' clones.

　I don't know why he hides this and then tries to prevent the "Sanctuary" from being liberated.

"If we go inside and ask Echidna... I wonder if we'll find out."

"Stop grumbling. I told you so, come in. Bring out that half-demon inside and put an end to this snowy scene. Otherwise I'll end up doing things I don't want to do."

　Gently lifting Rem in his arms, Garfiel cocked his cheeks at a sharp angle. It was an unsuitable smile, but Subaru knew that he was someone capable of carrying out such a demonstration. Whatever his true intentions, in order to protect the Sanctuary, he would easily catch one or two girls who shared the same face as his beloved.

Subaru: "Don't do anything to Rem. That's my condition."

"...Go."

　Speaking as coolly as he could in the cold wind, Subaru headed towards the tomb. Behind him, Garfiel was staring intently at his back.

　I don't know what he really means. Then I remember there's something I forgot to tell him.

　He had forgotten to tell his younger brother, Garfiel, about Frederica's death.

　I can only think that something was going wrong with my head, either from the cold or anger.

　Am I normal now? If I am, how can I remain normal?

　Petra is dead, the suspicious Frederica turns out to be innocent, and when he returns to Sanctuary he finds himself in this state. His relationship with Garfiel is at its worst, and the safety of the other people who remain in Sanctuary is a mystery.

　How can people remain normal when such a hostile environment continues?

　We must not stop thinking. We must not give up. We must look ahead, look up, and keep piling up what we can in order to grasp the future we should grasp.

　If that wasn't the case, then why would Subaru――

"――――"

　Only Subaru's footsteps could be heard hitting the dry floor of the tomb.

　Unlike outside the tomb, the inside of the tomb is barely affected by the raging cold. It's not an illusion that the cold is overwhelming, it's actually quite cold.

　With Subaru stepping inside the tomb, the tomb's functions of welcoming those who are qualified began to work, and a faint light came on inside the dark ruins.

　Following the dim light that led him deeper along the walls, Subaru used his limbs to conquer the tomb, feeling as though the blood in his body was beginning to freeze.

　And at the end of what felt like a long corridor, there was a wide open space.

　The first trial is the one where you are forced to face your past.

　And so, at the place we arrived at,

Subaru:

　The long-awaited sound of silver bells softly welcomed Subaru.

※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※

　In the darkness, Subaru hears his name being called and focuses his eyes on the figure in front of him.

　As his eyes slowly began to adjust to the darkness of the ruins, and her long silver hair and captivating amethyst eyes came into view, Subaru could no longer resist calling out her name.

"Emilia."

"That's right, Subaru. It's me."

　Subaru nearly collapsed upon hearing the reply to the four short letters.

　It may sound like an exaggeration, but it was an emotion I couldn't bear.

　Feelings of fatigue, lethargy, loss.

　Although he had felt that he had overwhelmed Subaru in many ways, standing before Emilia had brought him to his knees, those feelings that he had not been aware of up to this point.

　Subaru was about to fall forward, but an arm suddenly reached out and caught him.

　It was a soft, warm sensation. Looking up, Subaru saw a beautiful white face staring at him, and he forgot the situation and gasped in surprise.

　Now, Emilia was holding him tenderly in her arms.

"Oh, I'm sorry... I lost all my strength..."

"It's okay. I don't suspect that it was on purpose or that you did it on purpose. Even if you did it on purpose, I'm sure you would have received it like this."

　Emilia interrupts Subaru's excuses and blocks his escape route.

　Far from being reproachful, she gently comforted him, and Subaru let out a deep sigh of relief - and immediately realised that something was wrong with Emilia.

　Emilia's appearance was the same as always.

　She's kind, gentle, a little bit naive, full of compassion, cute, and somehow childlike in a way that's charming - just the same as always.

　Emilia's usual self right now was the same as when she was spending peaceful time at Roswaal Mansion.

　Unable to overcome the Trials, Emilia was tense with a sense of mission and this was not her usual self.

"Eh, Emilia... while I was away, well..."

　Has anything happened that caused a change in your feelings?

　Subaru carefully chooses his words to ask such a question.

　However, before Subaru could say that,

"--It was lonely."

"...picture?"

　Unable to clearly hear Emilia's mutterings, Subaru frowned and asked again.

　When he lifted his head, the silvery beauty was right beside him. Staring into her eyes, so close he could almost feel her breath, Subaru made sure he wouldn't miss a single word this time.

　Staring directly at Subaru, Emilia spoke.

"I was lonely, Subaru. --Because you left me behind."

"Ah... no, that's... not that. I didn't mean to leave you behind or anything..."

"――――"

Subaru: "I think I wrote about it in the letter too… but there was something I had to do. So I couldn't be with you for a little while. I truly regret making you feel lonely. Even though I made you feel that way, I wasn't able to finish the things that I had to do, so…"

"Hehe."

　Subaru quickly piled up excuses into the eyes of Emilia who was staring intently at him, but before he could finish his excuses, Emilia burst out, seemingly unable to bear it any longer.

　Subaru couldn't believe his eyes at that reaction.

　Emilia bursts out in the middle of a conversation, especially during such a tense moment?

　What was there to laugh at? Before that, Emilia wasn't the type of girl who could choose to react in such a way.

"You don't have to try so hard to make excuses. I'm not angry. Subaru, your face is all pale… hehe."

"Eh, Emilia...?"

"It's okay, Subaru. You left me letters, and you wrote lots and lots and lots of letters for me. I was lonely, and there were times when I wanted to cry… but I read those letters over and over again."

　Hearing that endearing thing, Emilia's smile deepened.

　Her adorable smile was captivating, and her sweet whispers grabbed Subaru's heart. Just hearing that she had treasured the letter Subaru had left behind, and had used it as a source of emotional support, made Subaru's heart burn with passion.

　But, holding back the self-consciousness that was threatening to be swept away by that passion, Subaru couldn't help but feel a bad premonition bubbling up at Emilia's change of heart.

　Something is wrong. Something is strange. The sense of unease I have felt for a while now has never been fixed and it has continued to this point.

　What's strange? Where is the discomfort? Even though he loves Emilia so much.

　Even though Emilia was responding to Subaru with such love.

"Emilia... How did the Trial go?"

"ordeal..."

"That's right, it's a "trial". That's why you came here, right? I'm sorry for making you go alone and putting you through such a difficult time. I want to apologize for that too, and I want to know what happened. Even if it's no good, I don't really care, but the fact that you're here now means..."

"No, I couldn't. I couldn't overcome the first "trial", the past. I'm sorry, even though you all had high hopes and worries for me."

"a..."

　Emilia's answer escaped Subaru's throat in a husky voice, and he regretted it.

　That sound may have sounded disappointing to Emilia. If that was the case, then Subaru had betrayed her immediately after telling her that he didn't mind.

　Subaru was overcome with a sense of urgency, but suddenly he felt a smooth sensation on his head.

　Emilia had her fingers stuck into Subaru's short black hair and was stroking his head with her palm.

　Subaru couldn't understand the true meaning of his actions and his eyes widened. Seeing Subaru's shocked expression, Emilia smiled and blushed as she said,

"Subaru, you like to touch my hair sometimes, right? So I thought I'd like to try doing the same to you sometimes. Hehe, Subaru, you're so vulnerable."

"Emi, Lia...?"

"What if Subaru just left me behind and disappeared like that… I really, really, really thought about it a lot. I thought it would be really scary. That's why I was so happy when Subaru came to see me earlier."

　Even though he had just spoken of failing the Trial, Emilia's eyes were only reflecting Subaru. Her eyes were hot and moist, and she was staring at him.

　Just how long Subaru had been waiting for the day to see himself reflected there like this.

　Just how much Subaru had yearned for her to call him by his name with such enthusiasm and to gaze into his eyes moist with passion.

　All for the sake of experiencing this passion, this moment, right now.

　that's why--.

"Subaru. Let's stay together forever. Stay together. If you're here, then I don't need anything else――"

　Subaru never imagined that the day when Emilia would recite her blind love for him would come to be such a frightening experience.

※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※※ ※

　With Subaru in her arms, Emilia continued to speak passionately.

"When I first heard that Subaru had disappeared, I was really sad. I got scared. Because I hadn't done anything right at all... and I was worried that Subaru might have been annoyed with me. When I thought about that, I got so scared, my body started shaking uncontrollably..."

"――――"

"But when I noticed the letter and saw that it was in Subaru's handwriting, my fears immediately subsided. Subaru is amazing. Even though I was so scared, he blew those feelings away right away…yeah, I feel like Subaru is always helping me out."

"――――"

"I was also happy with the contents of the letter. You wrote so much so that I wouldn't worry. It took a really long time. I was happy that you took the time for me, and that you must have been thinking about me during that time."

"――――"

"In your letters, Subaru told me "I love you" a lot. When you said it to me in the dragon carriage, I was so happy that I cried... but when I read your letters, I almost cried too. That's how big something he had given me... or so I thought. That's what I realized."

"――――"

"So when I saw Subaru come back, I just couldn't stop. Deep inside my heart, in the deepest part of my heart, a little part of me was calling out to him, his name. And then, I couldn't help but want to reach out and touch him like this…"

"――――"

"Right, Subaru. I'm sorry for everything up until now. I've been so cruel to you all this time. I made you put up with this, even though you felt this way. I now understand, a little, that that was a really cruel thing to do."

"――――"

"It must be hard to hold back these feelings. I was too selfish in front of you, Subaru, who was holding back. I wanted to think about you, I wanted to understand you, but I didn't understand you at all."

"――――"

"But, it's different now. I'm always thinking about Subaru. I've always been thinking about him. Like he told me he loved me, like he thought of me… Now I, too, want to think that way about Subaru… maybe."

"――――"

"No, I'm sorry. That was unfair of me. Even though you were scared, even though you didn't know what I was thinking, you still told me."

"――――"

"And so, I will also properly convey it. --I will convey it."

"――――"

"Hey, Subaru. I like you. I really like you. I think about you, and only you, and I want to be with you forever."

"――――"

"I'm glad that Subaru thinks the same of me."

"――――"

"Hehe. Yeah, yeah... I like it. Subaru... I love you."